Today, my husband thought it would be "funny" to put laxatives in the cakes for my son's 7th birthday party. Over 40 kids came to the party. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I yelled at my spouse in front of 20 guests for not coming to blow out his birthday cake candles. Turns out he was in the other room, quietly changing his disabled friend's diaper. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I lit my birthday candles on the cake I made myself and blew them out alone, while my worthless husband sat on the couch stuffing Doritos in his face. My present? He sprayed Lysol in the bathroom after he took a dump. FML
We are not amused
Today, it was my boyfriend's 24th birthday. His friends were throwing him a surprise party and I was in charge of getting his birthday cake. As a joke, I got it in the shape of a penis, with a graphic marzipan design. Funny, I never knew his overly-conservative parents were invited. FML
Here, have this
Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML
Kids these days…
Today, I'm a host at a restaurant. We had a birthday party for a couple of 15 year old boys and their friends. I went to clean the bathroom at the end of my shift and discovered cake everywhere, including all over the urinal. They were even nice enough to draw a smiley on the mirror with icing. FML
Boundaries
Today, as I'm 7 months pregnant and craving sweets, I helped myself to my MIL's birthday cake a little early. The family got so angry, they actually made me leave the party. My husband agreed with them. FML
Today, I had to call poison control because my idiot son swallowed a bunch of baking soda to "make a volcano in his tummy." FML
Today, at my 6-year-old son's birthday party, I had to explain to my boyfriend that it's not okay to use condoms as party balloons. FML
Great boyfriend, part 2
Today, my boyfriend made me a latte. It tasted off, but I didn't want to hurt his feelings so I drank it. Turns out he put laxatives in it as a prank. The idiot couldn’t just use one or two. He used so many that I had to go to the ER for severe dehydration after puking and shitting for hours. FML
Today, we were celebrating my birthday and my boyfriend thought it would be funny to shove my face in the cake. While the candles were still lit. FML
Top comments
evnflr 7
Now that's a shitty situation.
mama2b3 20
First of all your husband sounds really immature. Second, over 40 kids!!? Holy crap!
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Comments (283)
Amy78_fml 11
40 kids is a bit much for a birthday party. It would take an eternity to open that many gifts. Food tampering is never funny. Your husband is a dick.
marisadc79 0
Wow what an immature dad. He'd be cleaning up all the mess if it was me. Really awful thing to do and to a group of little kids.
hecseferblade 1
what a shitty party
kyyllee 3
looks like your going to brown town, for a good while!
AwkwardPartyBear 24
Sounds like that party was the shit!! (no? Bad pun?.. Okay :c )
AwkwardPartyBear 24
Sounds like that party was the shit!! (no? Bad pun?.. Okay :c )
Chad_the_Brony 0
I would've laughed at the situation. But I'm a very sadistic person.
jenssss 0
Definitely a shitty situation D:
knockoutmouse 8
OP, I strongly suggest that you encourage, or even demand that your husband seek professional counseling. Food adulteration and administering drugs without the recipient's knowledge is problematic enough on its own, but the fact that he did this en masse to a group of children should seriously call into question his decision-making abilities, if not his mental health. I'm not saying that as an insult, but as a genuine concern. It's possible that he could further endanger or seriously harm his own child(ren) with another "prank" like this.
thiscrazything 1
You married an asshole.