Today, my husband thought it would be "funny" to put laxatives in the cakes for my son's 7th birthday party. Over 40 kids came to the party. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I yelled at my spouse in front of 20 guests for not coming to blow out his birthday cake candles. Turns out he was in the other room, quietly changing his disabled friend's diaper. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I lit my birthday candles on the cake I made myself and blew them out alone, while my worthless husband sat on the couch stuffing Doritos in his face. My present? He sprayed Lysol in the bathroom after he took a dump. FML
We are not amused
Today, it was my boyfriend's 24th birthday. His friends were throwing him a surprise party and I was in charge of getting his birthday cake. As a joke, I got it in the shape of a penis, with a graphic marzipan design. Funny, I never knew his overly-conservative parents were invited. FML
Here, have this
Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML
Kids these days…
Today, I'm a host at a restaurant. We had a birthday party for a couple of 15 year old boys and their friends. I went to clean the bathroom at the end of my shift and discovered cake everywhere, including all over the urinal. They were even nice enough to draw a smiley on the mirror with icing. FML
Boundaries
Today, as I'm 7 months pregnant and craving sweets, I helped myself to my MIL's birthday cake a little early. The family got so angry, they actually made me leave the party. My husband agreed with them. FML
Today, I had to call poison control because my idiot son swallowed a bunch of baking soda to "make a volcano in his tummy." FML
Today, at my 6-year-old son's birthday party, I had to explain to my boyfriend that it's not okay to use condoms as party balloons. FML
Great boyfriend, part 2
Today, my boyfriend made me a latte. It tasted off, but I didn't want to hurt his feelings so I drank it. Turns out he put laxatives in it as a prank. The idiot couldn’t just use one or two. He used so many that I had to go to the ER for severe dehydration after puking and shitting for hours. FML
Today, we were celebrating my birthday and my boyfriend thought it would be funny to shove my face in the cake. While the candles were still lit. FML
Top comments
evnflr 7
Now that's a shitty situation.
mama2b3 20
First of all your husband sounds really immature. Second, over 40 kids!!? Holy crap!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (283)
Pelreskovich 11
I doubt you have 40 toilets in your home.. Hmm.. Funny, yet so, so immature.
KnucklesDeep 5
Did you not know this manchild's true nature before you married him?
ravenxcorvinus 9
that poor kid will never want a birthday party after this..
kate3101 15
Wow. That's unbelievably stupid. While there are people here suggesting retribution or saying that it's funny, what your husband did was 1)illegal 2)dangerous 3)cruel to your son Poisoning a group of 6 and 7 year old kids is not normal behaviour, or some kind of funny prank. It's massively dangerous and could cause genuine harm to the kids. Even as a prank on adults, it's not particularly funny, but on kids... sick.
theonlysweetpea 10
If he did this to a bunch of adults (goody goody's, suits, snobs [not geniuinely good people]) I'd laugh my ass off... but these are children. Pranks are cute until someone's body can't handle it. What about when OP's son gets his ass whooped at school for it or when those kids parents sue them (since it's illegal to give (certain) meds to people [knowingly
ShAdow7mcNugGet 7
Now that's something to remember
RedPillSucks 33
OP's husband is why the ball pit at Chuck-e Cheese is a dangerous place for kids.
skyeyez9 25
Did any crap their pants at your house?
skyeyez9 25
Your husband could get sued if the other parents find out. If he put too much inside, diarrhea can make young kids very ill.
skyeyez9 25
And I suspect they will when every kid gets the *****. None may want to go to any of your sons b day parties anymore and could stop being his friend.
ohsnapitsdye 3
Wow... I'd be embarrassed to call him my husband.