Today, my husband decided he would rather rage-wank to my mum's Facebook profile picture than make love to me. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my husband decided he'd rather jerk off to the Wii Fit trainer than have sex with me. FML
Today, hours after being turned down for sex, I woke up to my boyfriend sitting at the computer, jacking off to a picture of my deceased mom. FML
Today, I told my husband I was horny and wanted to get it on. He agreed but first he had to finish the chapter he was reading, watch his show on Netflix, argue with strangers on Facebook, then do his workout. He had the nerve to cop an attitude when I was no longer in the mood. FML
Today, like every other day, my wife doesn't have time for sex because she's too busy on Facebook. Then she bitched me out because "we never have sex anymore." FML
Today, my husband told me that he is done having sex because it eats up his online gaming time. FML
Today, after my husband told me he doesn't enjoy having sex unless he initiates it, my mother-in-law barged into my bedroom only to find me pleasing myself. FML
Today, my husband has been in a bad mood all week, so I finally demanded to know why. He told me his favourite porn site has suddenly started showing adverts, so now he can’t wank in peace anymore without pop-up ads appearing every 20 seconds. FML
Today, I found out that my husband thinks it's okay to have an online girlfriend and have naked pictures sent to his email, because he's not "physically touching, making love, or kissing." The sad part is that the online girlfriend gets more action than me. FML
Today, my husband let me know he felt I was ignoring him by jabbing me in the right ear with his erect penis while I was Skyping with my mum overseas. FML
Today, I walked in on my husband jacking off to a photo of himself. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
jamsie_fml 17
I like the phrase "rage wank." It paints a lovely picture.
flockz 20
when you say rage wank i imagine a man furiously masturbating while making guttural whale mating calls. thank you for that.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (66)
hannamajor 6
Moms got it goin on..
lildawg456 4
Stacy's mom has got it going on!
jonha21 11
You Must be Beautifull :)
OneObstacle 3
Yeah, being married doesn't make rape okay.
peachfuzz74 8
Mine wanks off to my cousins Facebook pics. Men are pigs!
TonyRuckus 5
YOUR MATE!!!
jw90 18
That's disturbing on so many levels
georjayy 11
Put a picture on your mom on your face so he'll have sex with both of you! :)
accountnamevalid 3
That's awful. I'm not even sure I know exactly what "rage wanking"implies, but anything that involves your husband, wanking and your mom is so, so gross. Also, I assume you saw this, so, yeah FYL and your eyes.
thewife5 19
That is messed up. Wanking off to Jessica Alba is one thing... But to your mom... Hell no!