Today, my husband decided he would rather rage-wank to my mum's Facebook profile picture than make love to me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband decided he'd rather jerk off to the Wii Fit trainer than have sex with me. FML
Today, hours after being turned down for sex, I woke up to my boyfriend sitting at the computer, jacking off to a picture of my deceased mom. FML
Today, I told my husband I was horny and wanted to get it on. He agreed but first he had to finish the chapter he was reading, watch his show on Netflix, argue with strangers on Facebook, then do his workout. He had the nerve to cop an attitude when I was no longer in the mood. FML
Today, like every other day, my wife doesn't have time for sex because she's too busy on Facebook. Then she bitched me out because "we never have sex anymore." FML
Today, my husband told me that he is done having sex because it eats up his online gaming time. FML
Today, after my husband told me he doesn't enjoy having sex unless he initiates it, my mother-in-law barged into my bedroom only to find me pleasing myself. FML
Today, my husband has been in a bad mood all week, so I finally demanded to know why. He told me his favourite porn site has suddenly started showing adverts, so now he can’t wank in peace anymore without pop-up ads appearing every 20 seconds. FML
Today, I found out that my husband thinks it's okay to have an online girlfriend and have naked pictures sent to his email, because he's not "physically touching, making love, or kissing." The sad part is that the online girlfriend gets more action than me. FML
Today, my husband let me know he felt I was ignoring him by jabbing me in the right ear with his erect penis while I was Skyping with my mum overseas. FML
Today, I walked in on my husband jacking off to a photo of himself. FML
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Top comments
jamsie_fml 17
I like the phrase "rage wank." It paints a lovely picture.
flockz 20
when you say rage wank i imagine a man furiously masturbating while making guttural whale mating calls. thank you for that.
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Comments (66)
noelasis94 18
Dress up like your mom and he'll either make love to you or rage wank to you, sounds like a win win. You get the attention you want, and he gets off.
stanjohnson 11
So, he was beating it like it owed him money?
bonesofkhaos 9
Sounds like a keeper!
Martinez0285 28
sounds like a peeper
perdix 31
"talktothefacecausethehandiswanking's mom has got it going on. talktothefacecausethehandiswanking's mom has got it going on. . . " Sounds like a great collaboration for PSY and Fountains of Wayne.
Ti996r28 7
That's messed up! If you were messed up like him, you could Rage one out to his dads facebook profile picture?
Ceejay1 13
First time I heard rage wank lol.
ladybuglet 22
Rage...wank? o_O
gizmo92 6
Yea it's my first time hearing "rage wank" aswell, but I reckon it will catch on quickly
amifaiyaz 12
He just wanted a quickie or you need to bring in the handcuffs.
yourwifelovesme 25
What the **** is rage wanking? Lol all I can picture is the hulk stroking his giant green dick
monnanon 14
that says more about you than it does the fml :)
Serisent 26
That's perhaps the most disgusting thing I've ever heard on this site, and I've heard a lot.