By Anonymous - United Kingdom - Pontypool
Today, my grandmother yet again asked where my grandfather is. She refuses to believe us when we tell her that he passed away 6 years ago. She always insists that he's out cheating on her and accuses us of lying to cover his arse. FML
Add a comment
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Create my account Sign in
Top comments
By  andits  |  21

Maybe it's her minds way of coping. Either way it's hurtful. It still really sucks especially for your family. I hope one day she can make peace with it.

By  khaskin  |  12

That's really rough. As bad as it is for you, imagine how confusing and upsetting life must be for her. Compassion and understanding goes a long way with memory issues or dementia. Sorry OP, seeing family like that is never easy.

  heyLaddieHey  |  18

Her husband has been dead 6 years. That's a lot of time to "cope" by refusing to believe he's dead. Unless she had recent head trauma, it's probably dementia.

  gracehi  |  31

I actually have that suspicion also, 5. I mean, not necessarily that he cheated on her throughout their whole marriage, but perhaps just once or twice was enough to make that impression. It's a tragic ordeal in any case.

  cocacola999  |  27

Not necessarily. One of the side effects of dementia is increasing paranoia. At the end of her life, my great grandmother was constantly accusing her neighbours of stealing behind her. It was sad, as they were nice people who had always helped her when she was still well.

By  ihartmytdi  |  23

This might sound a bit harsh but hear me out; maybe frame a picture of his grave/funeral service in her house to remind her of what has passed.

Dementia/Alzheimers isn't easy to deal with for anyone, but maybe she needs something tangible to recognize the reality of things.

  cheshireau  |  26

Doesn't always work. My Nan had Dementia before she passed and no matter the photos or the stories we told even really registered. It's a horrible, heart breaking condition.

By  abbyade  |  21

I work with patients suffering from dementia and Alzheimer's. It is tough especially when they miss their loved ones that are dead. All you can do is keep reassuring her that he's not cheating and he loves her so much, wherever he his.

By  bearbear120  |  27

I'm sorry to hear that op. My grandma had really advanced alzheimer's before she passed. So much that she didn't know who I was. I know how hard it can be on a family. Stay strong.