Today, my girlfriend went down on me for the first time. Just as I was reaching climax, my brother raced into the bathroom right next to my door and began to vomit extremely loudly. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was in the toilet when somebody started banging on the door loudly. I panicked and immediately cleaned my self and opened the door. As I opened the door, my brother vomited all over me. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were making out while she was laying on me. Her little brother walked in, saw us and yelled, "Mom they're swallowing each other!" FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML
Today, my brother met my girlfriend for the first time. Instead of making a good first impression, the first thing he did was talk about how he just took a massive dump and didn't wipe very well, and that's why his hand smelled bad. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to visit me and my brother at our apartment. I left for just five minutes to fix us lunch. When I got back, she was making out with my brother. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having it off in his den, I screamed at the height of my climax, and from the family room came the roaring laughter of my boyfriend's brothers. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML
Today, I had my first astounding orgasm, during which I simultaneously shat myself and vomited. I'm so thankful my new partner was present. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were both at home, sick. We decided to make the best of it and spent the day in bed together. Things got a little steamy, and we started making out. As I started kissing her neck, I got nauseous. Before I could pull away, I threw up all over her. FML
Today, my girlfriend gave me my first ever blowjob and she surprised me by deciding to swallow. Or so I thought. When she came up to kiss me, she spat my man-milk into my mouth and almost pissed herself laughing when I freaked out and nearly threw up. FML
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Top comments
Doortje 29
How romantic. Your brother made sure that your first oral sex experience is one you'll never forget.
Quasar55_fml 18
I bet he's been refraining just for that one moment :D
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Comments (60)
gallir24 6
Your poor brother. He;s vomiting while you're having fun. fhl
UpsidedownKayak 9
He probably had himself some rotten fish taco and was feeling the effects. You should be glad it wasn't your girlfriend that ran to the bathroom to vomit. If you keep yourself cheese free she will probably do it again. Don't worry, you will get your O-face.
DaveOnDope 4
To #15, As long as you find the right woman it ain't gonna cost nothing. Other than that you'll have to find a junkie ***** and pay extra or have a gram or two of cocaine to give her. (Don't do any coke yourself! Look at the perverted shit people will do for it!) BTW, have a shower curtain ready. This situation sure calls for one! And obey rule #1, ALWAYS USE CONDOMS WITH STRANGERS! And you should know how to make dental dams out of condoms if you need one. Cut off the end, then cut length wise along the tube. unroll and you have a sheet of latex to cover where you want to put your tongue.
emodude44 0
Maybe Ops brother was listening in? I wouldn't want to hear my sister getting eaten out either XD Still. that ruins the moment :/
aardvarkish 16
sounds gorgeous...
AvengedSevenfold_fml_fml 12
sounds like a huge turn on to me!! :D I know I would've been turned on... >.> <.<
MdMan2 23
Any chance you're a fan of "Two Girls One Cup"?
anonacs 0
Liar
braunwynn 5
Girl on girl makes me vomit too.
Doortje 29
Well, it says woman, so I think you can figure it out.
amsftw 0
today, I heard my sister getting it on while I was vomiting in the bathroom right next door. I could hear everything. fml
ImaginaryFoe 0
FYL. It sucks to be ripped out of the mood. You can't get it back easily.
goldieglock 5
It's extremely loud not loudly.