Today, my girlfriend told me there was good news and bad news. Bad news: she's pregnant. Good news: I'm probably not the father. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. She also said I'm going to be an uncle. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I broke the news to my parents that we're having a baby. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "It's probably not yours." FML
Today, I found out via a Twitter post that my girlfriend is pregnant. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, the good news is that my girlfriend is pregnant. The bad news is that twins run in her family. Worse, so do triplets, and I just recently lost my job. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend is pregnant. The problem is that I don't know how to tell my wife... Who is also pregnant. FML
Today, my friend told me she wanted to get pregnant. I thought that was good news, but then she said she wanted my boyfriend to be the father of her baby. FML
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a father. Too bad I can't tell my wife. FML
Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. I also found out that the dad has a fiancée. FML
Today, my girlfriend blew up at me for a comment I had made several weeks ago about not wanting kids. Then, she told me that she's pregnant. After consoling her and telling her that whatever we do, we'll do it together, she further explained that she's not sure if it's mine. FML
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Top comments
bobbycorwen 5
That's great news for in the long run! For now, no. I am sorry she's a cheating *****. :(
kjcamaro3 5
No diaper changing for you...more good news!!!
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Comments (230)
millz94 1
this shouldn't say girlfriend its should say ex girlfriend
mercsl65 7
abandon ship!
perdix 31
The good news is that you are dating an attractive woman. More good news is that you are about to become a "father" without having to have messy, disgusting sex. The trifecta of good news is that your kid is going to have random traits that will keep you guessing and entertained.
superpoptart 24
Assuming he'll stay with her.
Amrel 10
What perdix is trying to say: she did him a favor, why not?
perdix 31
#89, why wouldn't he? She's hot! She's got at least two guys ******* her, when lots of women can't even get one! One can say a woman is attractive, but ******* is where the rubber meets the road (in this case, someone forgot the rubber or it broke.)
cassidy112 0
But hey think atleast she didn't keep it from u... :) haha
AndieAvacado 0
thats just raunchy.
lewk908 13
that's damn good news screw that bitch
christiantalford 1
Why FML? do you really want a kid?
22jrdn55 15
you're not the sharpest crayon out there, now are you? SHE'S BEEN CHEATING ON HIM, YOU AIRHEAD!
cathyfang1533 12
Good news: You no longer have a cheating girlfriend, bad news: Your best friend is going to be a father, worst news: Your best friend is your dad
marissamay25 3
At least your not the poor bastard stuck with child support tell he/shes 18. Lucky you but sad since she bluntly told you she cheated at the same time. :/
rthieka 0
Damn!!! Screw her!