Today, I found out that my girlfriend is pregnant. The problem is that I don't know how to tell my wife... Who is also pregnant. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a father. Too bad I can't tell my wife. FML
Today, I found out via a Twitter post that my girlfriend is pregnant. FML
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. She hadn't even called me; I saw the news on my Facebook news feed. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend’s other girlfriend is pregnant. He doesn’t know that I know. A few days ago he told me that he couldn't have a baby with anyone. She has to be the right one, I guess I wasn’t. FML
Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. I also found out that the dad has a fiancée. FML
Today, I found out the girl my boyfriend was seeing just before me is pregnant. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. She also said I'm going to be an uncle. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend that my ex is pregnant, but not to worry because it’s not mine. That’s how I inadvertently told her I’ve been cheating on her with my ex. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend is four months pregnant. She can't wait for us to be parents. I guess she forgot that I haven't seen her in 7 months. FML
Today, I found out my husband is having a baby. Too bad I'm not pregnant. FML
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Top comments
Leeono 26
Start with. "Honey, I'm a **** and you deserve better. Since I've been an arsehole and an irresponsible one at that, please take me to the cleaners through the divorce and child payments while you have a better life."
weeping_willow 25
You’re disgusting. You don’t deserve a wife OR a girlfriend.
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Comments (36)
Leeono 26
Start with. "Honey, I'm a **** and you deserve better. Since I've been an arsehole and an irresponsible one at that, please take me to the cleaners through the divorce and child payments while you have a better life."
JasonThorn 21
That would suggest a certain level of self-awareness. Unfortunately, this guy decided to double up on self-IMPORTANCE instead.
Matt Kesler 16
dumbass
JasonThorn 21
Guess what? When you engage in the act of procreation... ...there's a chance you might just PROCREATE. Right now, getting a calendar is the epitome of "too little, too late."
weeping_willow 25
You’re disgusting. You don’t deserve a wife OR a girlfriend.
ahabsfan 15
You don’t have a wife nor a girlfriend. You have two women with which you engaged in intercourse who are both pregnant. Good luck with that.
manb91gb 15
My advice, with all the humility a stupid **** like you can muster. You wanna act like an animal, get treated like one. I hope they rip you to pieces.
1known 31
Contrary to others, I don’t know if you are a jerk or not (none of us know you) and I don’t believe that divorce is the best solution. But you clearly made a mistake. So act responsibly about it and provide support for your two kids. And probably when time comes you’ll have to tell your wife and your children and ask for forgiveness. Be humble about it. I hope they will be able to forgive you.
vadarose 12
Cheating isn’t a “mistake” or an “accident” OP knowingly cheated for who knows how long OP made that choice. OP chose to cheat and to continue cheating even though they knew it was wrong. OP doesn’t deserve shit. How could you betray your partner’s trust like that? It’s disgusting.
Mungolikecandy 19
I think the FML is that you are so dumb as to think people may empathize with this sort of thing.
Badgero 12
F***ing idiot
mfranks19891989 10
I’d me more worried about have to pay alimony , 2 child supports, plus all your bills. You gunna be 1 broke idiot for the next 25 years