Today, my girlfriend smelt my penis after I got back from the gym. She was making sure it didn't smell like latex. I can't even go to the gym without her thinking I'm cheating on her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took off my socks after I got home from the gym. Later, I found my fiance sniffing them, with an enormous boner in his pants. Ew. Ewwww. FML
Today, I saw my girlfriend scratch her crotch and then sniff her fingers. FML
Today, I noticed my girlfriend wiping her sweaty armpits with the small towel that I always use to wipe my face with after shaving. Now I know why the towel smells so bad. FML
Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
Today, out of habit, after scratching my balls, I then smelled my hand. It was at that moment I realized most of my gym was staring at me. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. When I took my underwear off, she looked at my penis, snorted, and covered her mouth. She claimed that her "allergies" were flaring and we have to wait until they clear up. FML
Today, during sex, my boyfriend found it appropriate to tell me he loves "how bad" I smell. FML
Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML
Today, I had to walk through the women's perfume section to get to my normal aftershave. A woman was trying out a perfume, which she squirted on herself and me. You can imagine the afternoon I had to endure after I got home to my wife and she could smell "some slut's scent" all over me. FML
Today, I realized that the air freshener in my bathroom and the air freshener in my girlfriend's bedroom are the exact same scent. Now, every time I go to the bathroom I get an erection, and every time my girlfriend and I have sex in her room, I think about shitting. FML
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Top comments
dudeitsdanny 10
She sniffed your sweaty crotch to see if you cheated? She took that chance? That's seriously psychotic. Nothing grosser than sweaty junk. Run, dude. Run before she picks up your scent! You'll never lose her once she does!
GingerFro 0
fyl she's got issues
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Comments (459)
sambabal 0
Sounds like an unfortunate smelling accident
EddieK91 5
I would talk to Miss Insecure about the issues of trust you two are having. If she's behaving that way then you may be acting suspicious or her friends are telling her you're cheating. Either you're going to want to sit down and talk to her about it, or the relationship is going to be ending and you may want to get a restraining order for her. >.>; To keep her away from you. That kinda does spell "crazy stalking ex-girlfriend."
jobsman99 0
you should stick your penis in her mouth and get a good ******** then tell her that is the only way to tell by tasting latex and that for her to be sure she needs to suck you like this about four or five times a day every day.
nightshado 1
just dont use a condom. thats what i would do.
jobsman99 0
then there would be a different taste or smell she would be expecting, I would assume.
kittea86 0
that is disgusting!
Chazyj 4
yes but when she found out your didn't do any think I can guess she did some think else for you ;-)
kiaralove53 0
Maybe she has low self esteem? She needs to work on her trust issues.
Fml4ja 0
You are probably a d bag that treats her like shit and cheats on her. My advice is grow the **** up and be a better guy. You should feel lucky to have a girlfriend who cares about you. These other people just say things on here to be funny. Like get real the kids probably **** up so bad in the past and is to selfish to realize it. Ha just like my ex.
Fml4ja 0
You are probably a d bag that treats her like shit and cheats on her. Grow the **** up and be a better guy. You should feel lucky to have a girlfriend who cares. These other people just say things on here to be funny. Like get real the kids probably **** up so bad in the past and is too selfish to realize it. Ha just like my ex.
wdfcrystal 6
It's funny how you're just assuming that with no evidence.
MzCherry29 0
And ur still wit her becaaaaaause????