Today, my girlfriend smelt my penis after I got back from the gym. She was making sure it didn't smell like latex. I can't even go to the gym without her thinking I'm cheating on her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
To each their own
Today, I took off my socks after I got home from the gym. Later, I found my fiance sniffing them, with an enormous boner in his pants. Ew. Ewwww. FML
We all do it. Don't we?
Today, I saw my girlfriend scratch her crotch and then sniff her fingers. FML
Multiusage
Today, I noticed my girlfriend wiping her sweaty armpits with the small towel that I always use to wipe my face with after shaving. Now I know why the towel smells so bad. FML
Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
Today, out of habit, after scratching my balls, I then smelled my hand. It was at that moment I realized most of my gym was staring at me. FML
Quick thinking
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. When I took my underwear off, she looked at my penis, snorted, and covered her mouth. She claimed that her "allergies" were flaring and we have to wait until they clear up. FML
To each his own
Today, during sex, my boyfriend found it appropriate to tell me he loves "how bad" I smell. FML
Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML
I can explain
Today, I had to walk through the women's perfume section to get to my normal aftershave. A woman was trying out a perfume, which she squirted on herself and me. You can imagine the afternoon I had to endure after I got home to my wife and she could smell "some slut's scent" all over me. FML
Mixed feelings
Today, I realized that the air freshener in my bathroom and the air freshener in my girlfriend's bedroom are the exact same scent. Now, every time I go to the bathroom I get an erection, and every time my girlfriend and I have sex in her room, I think about shitting. FML
Top comments
dudeitsdanny 10
She sniffed your sweaty crotch to see if you cheated? She took that chance? That's seriously psychotic. Nothing grosser than sweaty junk. Run, dude. Run before she picks up your scent! You'll never lose her once she does!
GingerFro 0
fyl she's got issues
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Comments (459)
myyomy 1
I'm torn between FYL and YDI... because that is just sad/bad... BUT you do put up with it.
logan_ptown 0
lol she has you on lock down
cheyenne_audrie_ 0
First off run as fast as you can she obviously doesn't trust you and thats not a healthy relationship. Secondly, if she's that paranoid she's probably cheating on you. Just say.
Askedforit 7
lol looks like u picked up a pet dog 'stead of a girlfriend.
ThaReeless 1
whip it out and say; "kiss the motherf¥€er while you're down there"
tundraman07 0
RUN!!!!"
Allymeme 3
dump her
itsalwaysYDI 0
Doesn't she know that you can take a shower before you come back? it's kinda pointless to smell your junk...and if she is crazy enough to smell it after the gym..it definitely can't end well. get out while you still can!
Mooby 6
WTF?! smell your penis?!!?
kindlystfupls 0
time for a new one!