Today, my girlfriend smelt my penis after I got back from the gym. She was making sure it didn't smell like latex. I can't even go to the gym without her thinking I'm cheating on her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took off my socks after I got home from the gym. Later, I found my fiance sniffing them, with an enormous boner in his pants. Ew. Ewwww. FML
Today, I saw my girlfriend scratch her crotch and then sniff her fingers. FML
Today, I noticed my girlfriend wiping her sweaty armpits with the small towel that I always use to wipe my face with after shaving. Now I know why the towel smells so bad. FML
Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML
Today, out of habit, after scratching my balls, I then smelled my hand. It was at that moment I realized most of my gym was staring at me. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. When I took my underwear off, she looked at my penis, snorted, and covered her mouth. She claimed that her "allergies" were flaring and we have to wait until they clear up. FML
Today, during sex, my boyfriend found it appropriate to tell me he loves "how bad" I smell. FML
Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML
Today, I had to walk through the women's perfume section to get to my normal aftershave. A woman was trying out a perfume, which she squirted on herself and me. You can imagine the afternoon I had to endure after I got home to my wife and she could smell "some slut's scent" all over me. FML
Today, I realized that the air freshener in my bathroom and the air freshener in my girlfriend's bedroom are the exact same scent. Now, every time I go to the bathroom I get an erection, and every time my girlfriend and I have sex in her room, I think about shitting. FML
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Top comments
dudeitsdanny 10
She sniffed your sweaty crotch to see if you cheated? She took that chance? That's seriously psychotic. Nothing grosser than sweaty junk. Run, dude. Run before she picks up your scent! You'll never lose her once she does!
GingerFro 0
fyl she's got issues
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Comments (459)
demonspeed 0
men who respond to this: "she doesn't trust you" women who respond: " you must have cheated before". why can she just not be a crazy insecure girl? why does he automatically have to be a cheater. sounds like all of you are a heartbeat away from smelling some balls....
wdfcrystal 6
agreed
kpadgett045 0
oh brother..thats a good sign to hit the road. and you know what they say if she's afraid of you cheating its probably because she already is.
shelby0123 0
usually the accuser is the one cheating
crushedone 7
I hope you gave her a sweaty teabagging.
StillNOLove 0
damn that's a trip.
welandedonthemoo 5
it's proly cause she's cheating and now thinks that u are.
kpadgett045 0
ok that confirms it all womeb are crazy, now i know why im gay...
cherrypassion 6
wtf is smelt?
rooneyroo 0
To smelt is to put raw metals into a forge and bring them to a liquified state, where you can then skim off the impurities and have the pure metal. no clue what the OP meant by it.
adiberkeley 0
**** her before you go to gym and when you come back **** her again or let her lick when she smell
al2halski 0
Dude why are you with someone who's that obsessed about you cheating? Sniffing somebody's penis is just weird.and creppy