Today, my girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took my girlfriend out for lunch, and I asked her if I could have a bite of her meal. She took it to mean I was calling her fat, and stormed out. FML
Today, my girlfriend started insulting me on Facebook. Angry and hurt, I let it all out and insulted her back with her obesity. Turns out it was her brother who used her account to play a "prank" on me. FML
Today, while in the shower with my girlfriend she was going on and on about how she thinks she's fat when she's in perfect shape. With what she said still on my mind, I meant to say "honey, you're so beautiful", but accidentally said "honey, you're so fat". I'll be sleeping alone tonight. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend what she thought of a certain plus-sized vocalist, to which she replied, "She's gorgeous!" I said, "That's great because you remind me a lot of her." Now she's not talking to me. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 5 years dumped me because she got tired of me being thinner than her and, in her own words, making her look bad. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I've recently become serious about getting fit, and have lost nearly 84 pounds. Apparently, when I was fat, I made her look smaller in comparison. When I got slimmer, she insisted I either gain the weight back or she'd leave. So she did. FML
Today, while having dinner with my boyfriend's family, his mom told me that it looks like I've gained quite some weight. When my boyfriend told her that this was a rude thing to say, she said it wasn't rude, just the truth. FML
Today, I went out to lunch with my girlfriend. I asked if she was going to finish her meal, hoping to steal a bite or two. She somehow took this as me calling her fat, threw her drink at me, and stormed off. I just wanted some steak. FML
Today, my girlfriend threw a bitch fit about her clothes not fitting and how she’s “so fat” to the point of storming out of the house when I asked her to please calm down. Just a couple of hours earlier, we'd ordered food and she ordered a salad, then asked to trade my burger and fries with her. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML
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Top comments
ifuckmonsters 5
And you're surprised?
RochelleRedvines 8
She asked for it. Literally.
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Comments (144)
calivianya 29
Wow, so many think you deserved it... come on! If she asked you to insult her, OP, what should she expect? She needs to grow up and get over it. It sucks for you how childish she is.
Brahmzy1 3
Obviously a female posted this.
RebeccaRFT 18
Yes but you don't insult the girl's LOOKS. Insult her personality but not her looks! Looks are hard to change.
tsent8 15
Do you WANT to lose your balls never call a girl fat EVER!!! The correct response would be I can't honey there's nothing Wrong with you.
nubnibbler 4
.. Or just not a dick.
Pretty_reckless_fml 18
Shutup Axiarus, Tsent is bang on the money :) calling a girl perfect= every girls dream
DLT_fml 20
I've called my girlfriend perfect so much that I'm now only allowed to say it once per day... :(
tsent8 15
39- remember that girl that put icy hot on her boyfriends balls? I think I'm doing just fine.
pmadNess 16
Agreed. Anything but the weight!
kAPISH 29
69- You're perfect.
hamusta 13
Obviously there IS something wrong with her since she insulted her boyfriend.
Pretty_reckless_fml 18
Awww thanks #86 :')
kAPISH 29
Why all the dislikes? If you could make a girl happy by just telling her the truth, why shouldn't you? if that's not worth 2 min of your life, I don't know what is.
kristof16 1
You had it coming.even then your supposed to say something nice
wannabesinger 16
He had it comin', he had it comin'. He only had himself to blame. If you'd have been there, if you'd have heard it, I betcha you would have done the same.
tjisnumbaone 5
FYL because she should've not cared because she wanted you to insult her. YDI because you could've done something less harsh than that. Ultimately you could've been the better person by saying that you forgive her and don't need to insult her.
panda_lou 11
What if he hadn't forgiven her and what if her comment was worse?
BadGuy_Ogg 4
ITS A TRAP!!! NOOOO...oh its too late
traveler_ghost 12
anything but calling a girl fat, what were you thinking? Exactly you weren't thinking, most girls-like me take thar stuff to heart. now she's going to be all insecure and focus on her weight
traveler_ghost 12
*that...errr
AznSamoan52 10
Well, she had it coming.
poker_smile 6
What you should always, always say in a time like this is: Insult you? But you're perfect. You had this one coming
FlashBurn 13
At least she felt bad, but you should have told her what was said can't be taken back and just dropped it. At least you don't have to ask her to be quiet? :D
Zoey5683 17
I laughed when i read this. It's mean but that is definitely the wrong insult to choose from. Then again, a lot of choices are the wrong move the make. Depends on how the girl would react to such insults.