Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and refused to give me back the condoms I'd just bought. Why? Because she wants to use them with the guys she's been cheating on me with. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She gave me back the brand new box of 12 condoms that I had bought and left at her house. There were 8 left and I wasn't the one who opened them. FML
Considerate
Today, I walked in on my girlfriend cheating on me. The guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML
Today, my girlfriend came to my house crying because the guy who she has been cheating on me with doesn't want to be with her anymore. FML
Trust
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out that her ex cheated on her when they were together, so she pegged all men the same, saying she was done with relationships, and didn't care if she hurt me or not. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I refused to share a toothbrush with her. FML
Today, the condoms I bought a few years ago as a celebration of dumping my girlfriend due to a lack of sex, have expired. Every last one of them. FML
White lie
Today, a girl I like was taking her phone out of her pocket and two condoms fell out. Last week I'd tried hooking up with her and she'd said that she only has sex with a man who is her boyfriend. So I said, “Oh, new boyfriend, huh?” She said, “Nah it’s for hookups, gotta be prepared!” I guess she forgot she lied to me. FML
Whispers
Today, I went to work leaving my girlfriend asleep in my bed. Later she calls me, demanding to know how long I've been cheating on her. We don't use condoms but she found several in the bin when she decided to empty it. I had to explain while my colleagues listened that I use them to masturbate. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I was too tired for sex, which she interpreted as me confessing to not wanting to have sex with her because I’m having sex with other women. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML
Top comments
sam_stalker 0
Steal them and poke holes in all of them, then give them back! That will show the cheating bitch
mjsmclaren 0
be a man, tell her u poked holes through all of them.
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Comments (82)
MaraDolce 0
Well #9 that's why you take a pin and poke all the way through the package...
ashole1990 10
done this before eh?
MaraDolce 0
haha not that I'm admitting to...
ashole1990 10
smart girl [i assume]
redbluegreen 41
Sometimes people like playing world destroyer while they're bored in Wal-Mart.
MaraDolce 0
haha definitely a girl, idk about being smart...lol
zeeky 0
your girlfriend broke up with you and all you care about are condoms? YDI
no1askdu 5
sounds like you need some more condoms...
_Noon_ 0
It's pretty lame that you asked for them. If I were your ex-girlfriend I wouldn't give them back either.
Velorium 0
Stupid idea to ask for them back, so you're definitely just whining. She's definitely a cheap bitch for keeping them to bang the other dude she cheated on you with though.
OrderXsoL 0
first!
_Noon_ 0
Ehrm, no. #20. But your life will go on anyway, and eventually you'll get over it.
YouSoDeservedIt 0
Look in the bright side - at least you were using condoms. (I'm sure if this cockdepository hasn't caught something yet, she will.)
di3zel_fml 0
eee... you really asked her to give them back to you... HAHA no wonder your life sucks.. you're probably the reason it sucks..." can i have the condoms back? " lol? l.a.m.e
Livyxx 0
woww fakee muchh, this is a repeatt exactlyyy on the last page seriously how lame can you actually be you have to make up a fml to get one the site gett a lifeee buddyy.
baileys82 0
get your shit tested
mzbosii 0
be thankful she's using condoms so you won't catch some shit from her!!! you deserve better!! no one deserves to be cheated on!!! you'll find someone better