Today, my dog found my marijuana pipe and the bag it was in and brought it to my parents. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Mom hobbies
Today, on a road trip my mom got out to walk her dog. Her jar of Marijuana fell out of the car and rolled across the parking lot. FML
Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML
Today, I woke up to a note from my parents saying we needed to talk. Assuming it was about the weed I'd left on my dresser, I quickly confessed. Turns out my dog died. FML
Today, I came home to my parents holding my marijuana. They told me that I had the stupidest hiding place ever, and that I was, "not only a pothead, but a dumbfuck pothead." FML
Today, my mom smoked pot in my sister's bedroom while I was at school. When I noticed the stench, she blamed the cat. FML
Nice friends you've got there
Today, my friend got pulled over. The cops searched the car and found a bong among the stuff we were moving to her new house. When they confronted her with it, she told them it must be mine, and that she'd never seen it before. FML
Sneaky
Today, my boyfriend gave me a teddy bear. I thought it was a sweet thing to do, until I saw him open a slit in its back while visiting later in the day and removing a bag of weed. He gave me a teddy bear just so he could smuggle drugs past my parents. FML
Stoner
Today, my parents were out, so I lit up my first ever joint. I got so stoned out of my mind that when my dad came back home and asked what the smell was, I said a stray cat had left an upper-decker in the toilet. He found the joint in my room, and now I'm grounded for the rest of the school year. FML
Family portrait
Today, my boyfriend sent a picture of me posing with our dog to his family via a group text. Along with our 25" bong. FML
Today, my angry ex-girlfriend ordered a bong to my house in my name. I came home to my parents screaming at me, demanding to know where "the weed" was. FML
Top comments
ChaosChild 0
Smart dog.
jim_witness 0
That dog is a narc
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Comments (148)
obff527 7
freekin stoner. fido should get a bone for that.
Nate25 0
stupid pot addicts
Crash92 0
pot addict? wtf? you cannot be addicted to pot. therefore your argument = null and void
sagwaagua 0
hah you actually can. it doesn't have to be a physical addiction
onexgun 0
I'm so sick of everyone thinking all stoners are pot addicts... if you get hooked on weed you really fail at life. we just know how to have a good time and the only haters of it are those who've never done it. it's really not addicting what so ever
macs4evr 7
"weed is fine it's not like it's baaa... umm... what was I saying? huh?" this is why u don't smoke weed morons
SmokinWeed 0
87 I would kindly name off "morons" who have accomplished so many great things for the world, but there is a bowl packed and it's my turn.
colliebuddz420 7
******* weed stereotypes....
pechi_305 7
If we explain "addiction" as being as addicted to heroin, weed is not addictive. However, if we actually take the dictionary definition of addiction, we can be addicted to anything including inanimate things like love, happiness and many other feelings. So weed can be addictive in this way. I used to smoke weed everyday, now I smoke maybe once a week. I was actually failing school and was going into a complete downfall before starting to smoke marijuana. Now, I have straight a's and I am staying out of any trouble. So there goes your stereotype.
silly_kate 0
ouch! this is why you do pot at a friends house.......i mean, drugs are bad, mk?
oopsie_daisy8446 0
Drugs = stupid. YDI.
MajesticMersi 0
that's just an opinion... :D
superswagbro 7
No its a fact ******* dumbass.
person1000003 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Hahahah dumbass that's what u get for taking drugs
kittykat2009 0
i say split it with the dog a talented dog like taht deserves a fricken treat :)
ethanmonroe 0
I'm guessing your dog's a Lab Retriever or some form of Shepherd. Can't be a chihuahua or one of those rats, they're too stupid and too light to carry one of those.
Tink4me 0
actually I have four chihuahua's and they are very smart and they can pick up anything they put there mind to
Besker 0
there's nothing wrong with smoking pot, in fact let's look at the facts. Drinking makes people aggressive, illogical, and prone to a very serious condition called DEATH!, while marijuana causes relaxation, paranoia and hunger. Now I'm not the smartest person in the world, but I know I'd rather choose the one that won't kill me if I have too much. Oh and by the way, the chemicals that make up alcohol are also used to make jet fuel. Think about that the next time you want to get drunk; and to the OP, that was probably the dog telling you and your parents that it wants to get high too, so let it join in.
atoz_123 0
#32 u get addicated to pot easily just not physically but it is much worse to be psychologically addicted to a substance its illeagal and u can die from it dumbass and not all people get agressive when drinking when your parinoed u r aggressive wow u obviosly arent smart cuz im 13 and know more about it
fatduck 0
How exactly can you die from smoking pot? Id love to hear the explanation, please include your sources and a few examples if you can.
R0lling_St0ner 0
dude it IMPOSSIBLE to get addicted to pot I've been smoking it for 5 years still as smart as I am now as was before if fact a lil smart cuz (I at least) can think easyer when I'm high, not better but it helps me do calculus and I get 90% most of the time (and I have ADHD with extrem paranoia issues) and guess what my docter Percribes it to me.........now let me ask you would a DOCTER of all people in this world subscribe that to you if it didn't help in some way?????? now I'm not saying its not bad for you but it's A HELL OF ALOT better then some of the shit out there as for the paranoia, you need to be in a relaxed enviroment and that won't happen
dioxyde420 0
It is physically impossible to die from eating/smoking too much. You can't kill yourself eating the amount of your own weight, even. YES, that is PROVEN.
firey994 0
pot should be legal it has never killed anyone. theoretically you would have to smoke 1500 pounds in 15 minutes to die of an overdose. alcohol and tobacco kill thousands of people each year . it is extremely hard to get cancer from pot because most people don't smoke every day and when they do smoke it isn't as much as tobacco.
onexgun 0
you can not die from a THC overdose.. invade you didn't know THC is what gets you high also exactly what position are you In to say if it's addicting or not? you've prolly never had it. I don't go sayin shit unless you've had experence with it kid.
guitarbeast 22
36 you retard, you can't get addicted to pot easily, and even if you do, if you stop for about 3 days then on day 4 you'll b fine, and also you cannot die from it, you would need to smoke half your body weight in one sitting which is physically impossible, the only person who ever died from weed was actually eating it strait up and a lot of it. also yes maybe not all people get violent while drinking, but just cause you'll get a tiny bit of paranoia, doesn't make you violent, intact out of all the people who I've seen drink and smoke, I've seen drunk people fight but never baked people fight. the only real paranoia is them scared of getting caught because it's illegal! well anyways people, just cause this little kid is a retard don't judge all of us because I'm 14 and am nothing like this retard
matt0794 1
lmao sorry bro but everything you said is pretty much wrong. first of all, your grammar sucks, and second of all you can die from smoking weed, but it takes several years of constant use. also, just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean you're aggressive. why kind of logic is that? drinking is much more harmful to your body only if done too often. the side effects can make you make stupid choices that could lead to death, but if done only on occasion to are fine. plus, sometimes, you're right people don't all get aggressive with alcohol, but they do by get aggressive only when paranoid. I put a lot ore into that comment than I though I was going to haha.
guitarbeast 22
91 you can't die from years of constant use, I know someone who has almost constantly being smoking weed since he was 12
Isoldael 27
Just for everyone's information, smoking pot does cause brain damage. Not saying that it's worse than alcohol... But still, brain damage. And since when is something "okay" when it doesn't kill you?
superswagbro 7
Umm 39 your spelling suggests you are in fact an idiot.
SackSomething 0
Is your dog's name McGruff by any chance?
alson 0
Owned by ur dog. FYL