Stoner

By Alyssa - 13/02/2012 00:01 - United States

Today, my parents were out, so I lit up my first ever joint. I got so stoned out of my mind that when my dad came back home and asked what the smell was, I said a stray cat had left an upper-decker in the toilet. He found the joint in my room, and now I'm grounded for the rest of the school year. FML
I agree, your life sucks 11 823
You deserved it 83 031

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Weed and cat shit smell nothing alike.

#60 You smoke weed, you don't use a needle..

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At least he didn't get caught smoking a joint. That would've been bad.

"I never smoked it!" *licks dad's face*

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It actually is though

As the great Mr. Mackey once said: "Mmm drugs are bad. Mmkay."

The only coke I do is diet.

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it's safer to smoke weed than to walk down the street outside for God's sake

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Marijuana isn't bad for you at all? Wow don't we all wish that.

Cannabis is harmless. Do your research.

#42 Uh doesn't it cause brain cancer?

Cannabis itself may not do too much harm, but most marijuana still had a ton of carcinogenic materials added to it. It may not be as bad as cigarettes, but it's still bad for you.

I don't really understand why people do drugs. I mean, it obviously is painful (needle) and just makes you retarded. If you're trying to be cool go get an Afro or something. Jus sayin.

#49 it isn't at all, so wish come true.

#60 You smoke weed, you don't use a needle..

#54 you mean brain damage? the government put that out there, yes. But the actual study said "lack of oxygen" was the cause. And you would have to hold your breath for 4mintues to do any damage at all.

Shoulda smoked outside.

Cannabis is only harmful if smoked. Nothing bad about it if it's in baked goods. It's only bad when combusted. Do some research people before you criticize

All drugs are bad. People do them for the following reasons: a) they are stupid b) they want attention c) both a and c

Studies have said that drugs, even weed, can cause schizophrenia. You can't tell me it's completely harmless.

Smoking it is harmful cuz it's still smoke. Bong has reported to have been harmful and just like fast food the chances of finding clean and non chempumped supply would be difficult

Yes they are, but they can be enjoyable and safe if taken responsibly and in moderation. I am not going to say marijuana is harmless, it is far from it, but the amount of bad rap it gets in contemporary society is largely undeserved when compared to other drugs such as tobacco and alcohol. OP deserved it for being dumb enough to get caught, but it also sucks that he has dick parents. One joint will have almost negligible effect on anyone's life, so being grounded for a year for doing something that in reality has little meaningful issues is pretty extreme. Unless, of course, your the sort of person that believes marijuana is taken through needles and it is possible to overdoes from too much THC.

There's not 1 recorded death due to marijuana in over 4000 years since it began being used. If it "Causes Cancer"? Why haven't we seen any cancer patients caused by weed, the government would make sure it's the center of medial attention so they can point to him and say, weed kills.

Its not difficut u get a vaporizer no smoke or eat hash brownies its that easy now shut up

#88 you forgot: D. It's fun. E. It can make you relax. F. it can make you eat. G. It can help dull the pain of illness. H. It helps the economy and supplies people with jobs. Etc.

Also, weed does not cause schizophrenia, some patients with schizophrenia who have smoked marijuana had mental issues as elder citizens.

I stay above the influence. It makes me feel unique to know that while half of my school is getting into drugs I'm staying sane.(:

YDI for getting high alone

Tell me what's bad about it

First ever joint? You don't usually get high the first time... & If you did it wouldn't be "out of your mind"....

Studies have shown that blueberries cause colon cancer. But people keep eating them cause it rarely happens. Same in your case

Isn't lighting up in her parent's house sort of disrespectful if there are rules against smoking? Go outside or go to a friends house maybe...

Why do you people have to argue about every fucking thing?

Weed is not bad, if u say it is you are literally fukin stupid

42. indeed it is used for medical purposes. not for some drug addicts to go around smoking for pleasure. now, all though it's used for medical purposes, doesn't mean it's necessarily good for you.

Watch super high me. The guy made higher test scores while he was stoned. And marijuana is better for you than alcohol. Marijuana is not a drug, it's a plant. People need to do research before they open their mouths about something they know nothing about.

Actually, weed has been proven to be harmful to the lungs (if smoked). It still has carcinogens in it. However, it has also been proven to be helpful in medicinal purposes...like, for example, someone with cancer smoked weed to increase their appetite so they would eat more.

What? Do you dumb asses think they made it illegal just to make people mad? No. We've been watching all sorts of videos on Marijuana and other illegal drugs and the main problem with all of them is that they cause Dopamine in the brain to be produced more quickly and abundantly than natural things which can cause you to only feel good by doing that drugs which causes an addiction.

Yet cigarettes also release dopamine. Dumbass. If they are going to make marijuana illegal, shouldn't they make cigarettes illegal too?

I've watched the videos in my health class at school.^

Nearly all your arguments are retarded. This goes for people on both sides of the issue. Marijuana is relatively harmless. It's not completely harmless, but its damage when consumed is no more than other substances (certain foods, caffeine, alcohol, medicine) you use on a daily basis. Smoking it has it's obvious drawbacks, but then again, if you're going to smoke anyway, it's much less harmful than other smokeable substances. Honestly, McDonald's will do you more harm than an occasional joint. There are also numerous benefits of using marijuana, and a good potential for it to be an adequate replacement for other, more harmful habits or medicines. At the end of the day, each and every one of you has the responsibility to weigh the positive effects of marijuana against the negative, and decide for yourselves whether it's worth it to you, personally. Now stop judging everybody else and focus on yourself.

Yes. But cigarettes cause dopamine to increase in abundance too. The reason that marijuana is illegal is because it is considered the *gateway drug*

If they made cigarettes illegal today what would happen? It would take years to get them out of the US, and that would be just the ones that they have in stores, its not like they are going to barge into homes and search for cigarettes. they would probably have a much larger underground market than marijuana or any other drug. It's kinda like when they made alcohol illegal, people started making their own, moonshine and others were made and sold and it was too much effort and money being wasted to try and stop something that wasn't going to stop. So they re-legalized it.

For all of those who say that marijuana isn't a drug: you should really look up the definition of a drug.

Hey all! I just feel like I need to point out that coffee can be labeled a "drug" since it has caffeine in it, if you don't believe me just walk down to a Starbucks and see how many people go there because they "gotta have coffee"

Yet, did you know if they legalized marijuana, the tax from it would pull us out of our economical turmoil in less than 20 years?

Holy shit can't we all just agree that this FML was funny and stop worrying about whether weed is good or bad?? None of you are going to change anyone's opinion so get over it.

I'm assuming that you can get much more high off of marijuana than most legal substances (I wouldn't know), and since people can get arrested for public intoxication, if they legalized marijuana how many people would get high and do crazy shit and cause more money to be spent on repairs and many other things.

My wise teacher told me "Marijuana itself is harmless, but when smoked thats when things are bad." Marijuana is a drug. Simple as that. And stoners are essentialy drug addicts. But since people who smoke weed think its not a drug they deny they have any problem. I have seen marijuana do more harm than good. I smoke occasionaly but because I like to; it calms me. The fact is weed isnt how it used to be; theres a hell lot more THC in it and additives. Thats why so many people become dependant on it. It really does f your life up. That being said everyone has different views on it.

please dont ever speak again, you dont know what youre talking about and youre dead wrong.

they don't cause it, they bring it out in people who already have it

Weed isn't a drug? That's like saying an apple isn't a fruit

yeah cuz a government sponsored health class is gonna give you unbiased, empirical information.

Your environment and personality affect the probability of doing harder drugs as well.

I don't smoke but I have plenty of friends that do. I respect people's decisions to smoke, however, I do have a problem with the argument "weed is natural; it's a plant". Well so is Poison Ivy, and last time I checked, that stuff can be pretty bad for you!

#203 People don't do crazy shit when they're high, they do the opposite. They eat chips and play video games...

Ok name carcinogens that are in marijuana.... and if there are any actual carcinogens it is cancelled out by the cbd in marijuana...

Weed and cat shit smell nothing alike.

Wait, they don't? Then what have I been smoking?

You've probably been smoking cat shit then

Cat piss on the other hand is a strain of weed lol.

How would you know 2?

Either 2 smokes/smoked it, or mainly because weed has a very distinctive smell.

78, it's pretty obvious. You dot need to sniff cat shit and weed to know.. You just do

Why didn't you throw out the joint? You deserved it.

78- Im pretty sure most people know what marijuana smells like. its no big deal

It smells more like skunk.

LOL IDIOT !!!! This is why youre not supposed to do that :|

Or at least hide the evidence

Remember kids, weed is bad. Go for the whiskey!

Not so high and mighty now I guess hah

Well...Probably high, just not the mighty part.

you don't get high the first time so unless it was a gram joint you shouldn't of been that high. that said, if you're going to smoke, at least make an effort to get rid of the smell

Febreze often does the work ;)

You totally deserve it. If you're going to smoke a joint do it outside of the house.

Or just don't smoke it at all...

I want to fuck you, beautiful

The narwhal? Me too.

160 what the hell Is wrong with you perv!

Or just don't. People just don't realize how addictive they actually can be because of how common they are. Marijuana is everywhere. Like cigarettes.

Seriously, if it's your parents' house anyway. I hate it when these idiots do dumb shit in their parents' houses and then whine when they get called out on it.

Dude, you couldve diffused the situation by offering him a hit. Kids these days have no common sense.

Fucking genius!

My dad would be all over that

110- you look familiar brah

Ya 110 kinda does look like a bra.

YDI for not finishing it and for putting a joint that was lit inside the house.

Don't do drugs, GIVE HUGS!^^

How about i punch you in the face.

How the hell is this an FML?

A stray cat left an upper decker? Bahahahahahaha

Is this The Stig!?!?!?!?!?