Today, my dad walked in on me using the bathroom. After rushing out, he yelled at me through the door for not locking it. He made up the "no locking the doors inside the house" rule. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was getting out of the shower and realized I’d forgotten to lock the bathroom lock. I heard someone coming towards the door and panicked. I hid behind the curtain and tried to stay completely still, but my dad walked in, saw me standing there like a statue, and just said, “Oh, erm, I’ll come back later.” FML
Today, I desperately needed to pee, but my mom was in the bathroom taking a shower, so I waited patiently until she finished. Just as I was about to go in, my half-naked dad rushed ahead, said "Going somewhere, son?" and shut the door on me. FML
Today, while on a road trip, I went to the bathroom at a gas station and locked the door. Turns out the lock was automatic and I'd actually unlocked it. My mom walked in on me, but instead of apologizing and leaving, she yelled at me in the middle of the gas station. FML
Today, my mom yelled at me for not pooping with the bathroom door open like the rest of the family. FML
Today, I got into an argument with my dad in his hotel room. I lost my temper and stormed out onto the balcony for some fresh air, at which point he decided to lock the door behind me, trapping me there for half an hour while he watched TV. FML
Today, I was taking a dump, when my dad shouted for me to go wash the dishes. Fed up with his constant shit, I told him to bite me. He took this as an invitation to wedge the bathroom door shut for nearly two hours, despite all my pleas and apologies. FML
Today, I found my dad using my bathroom. Why? Because he "had to take a crap" and didn't want to stink up his own bathroom. FML
Today, I locked the door to our only bathroom so my two year old wouldn't get in and make a mess. I crapped my pants while trying to unlock it with the key that rests on the frame. FML
Today, we got new doors fitted. There were new locks on the bathroom, to the reluctance of my mother, who thought one of us would lock ourselves in. "Only an idiot would lock themselves in," I said, and shut the door to demonstrate. I locked myself in. FML
Today, my dad came home and wanted to grab a glass. It wasn't in direct sight so he slammed the cupboard door so hard, I peed my pants. FML
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Top comments
rahavan 15
Um I have a no door locked policy at my house but I'm smart enough to realize it doesn't extend to the bathroom.
Zya_fml 8
It's okay spelling bee contestant.
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Comments (76)
bizarre_ftw 22
Tell him, record the conversation/yelling match, start locking doors, when he complains: play his own words - telling you to lock doors - back at him. You win, logically and irrefutably, if he starts arguing with himself have him locked up in an asylum
jcarroll 0
My dad has the same damn rule! -_-
catherineepie 1
Boy or girl?
sassypenguinxox 15
Has he ever heard of knocking?
topgearrules100 0
THE SAME EXACT THING HAPPENED TO ME!!!!
louize_fml 0
Fhl for having a stupid son/daughter like you. Ugh!
kcd159 0
Parents... This way about everything
nightDREAMERms 6
Psh. Y'all be lucky. I've got the no-locked-door rule that extends even to the night. Hot damn air-conditioningless Floridan summer nights. Where it's wear stuffy pajamas or risk being exposed and woken up by overbearing parentals in their little midnight patrols.
MeowsLikaLion 4
my dad does that kind of thing all the time. he's embarrassed so he tries to take the blame off himself. he walked in on me once and yelled at me for not closing the door, which i had done.
Giantone56 0
Now, thats funny, lol!