Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML

Today, my dad came to my graduate art show wearing a t-shirt saying "My other daughter is a science major". He'd had it specially made. FML

Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML

Happy birthday?

Today, I picked up a birthday card for my dad at the supermarket in a mad rush. I didn’t realise that the inside said “From your daughter”. He thinks this was my way of coming out as trans, and said that he'd suspected it for years. FML

Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML

Thanks for coming to my TED Talk

Today, it's my birthday. My dad was supposed to take me to get a tattoo, but instead he went to the bar, got drunk, and told me how I was the biggest mistake he and my mom have ever made. FML

He's still got it

Today, my dad got drunk at a party and flashed me and my friends. FML

How appropriate

Today, I found out my husband had bought my one year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML

Glittery letters

Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML

News to me

Today, my dad told me he liked men. While he was making a drunken speech. At my wedding. FML