Today, my dad attempted to fix a power outlet. He managed to shock himself with 120 volts and fall backwards, landing on top of me. I am 85 pounds and he weighs 290 pounds. FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I tried to hang up a light and, in my clumsiness, got shocked. My dad started screaming at me for yelling out. FML
Today, I tried to beat my dad to the car. I jumped over the steel cables in the parking structure and hit my head on a metal pipe, then bounced off the wires, and onto my back on the pavement. Good thing we were already at the hospital to visit my sick mother. FML
Today, my dad decided to wake me up by opening the shades and having the sun shine on my face. When he pulled them up, the metal holder on top broke off and fell on me. FML
Today, my father was pruning the tree in our front yard. I was helping him collect the falling branches. At one point, a branch fell and I was under it. My father jumped to push me out of the way. Instead he pushed the branch into my face. FML
Today, my dad ran over my foot with his work truck. FML
Today, my dad gathers so much static electricity from almost everything that he does that I've become paranoid and scared to touch him at all. He thinks I hate him now. FML
Today, while moving a couch and repeatedly asking my dad what he was trying to do and him ignoring me, I got my hand slammed between the corner of the couch and a doorway, because my dad shoved the couch without saying anything. I was holding the corner to stop it from falling on me. FML
Today, my dad was fixing my wardrobe and pushed too hard, causing stuff to fall from the top shelves. I saw it happen with my own eyes, but he's dead-set convinced that it was some kind of poltergeist fucking with him, and now he doesn't want me to go in my room. FML
Today, my dad and I were shovelling snow off the roof. I told him I was going to jump off the roof. He told me to go ahead, so I did. He failed to tell me that the snow was packed and wouldn't break my fall. I now have an injured back. He didn't tell me because he didn't think I would actually do it. FML
Today, I was awoken by my dad yelling into my ear. In shock, I jumped up off the couch, and came smashing down into the coffee table. FML
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Top comments
theblackhannah 0
wow..gain some weight?
allplayedout 20
unrelated, but how can you only weigh 85 pounds? I'm a girl and havent been so small since I was ten. are you eleven or very short?
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Comments (220)
thebrownnick 0
how ******* old are you to weigh 85 lbs.
lexisdakotaa 5
is it normal to be as small as all these people are??..
b1ondiee 0
again shut up give them a break. we don't need to hear ur whining and complaining .
jrockstar123 0
HOW OLD ARE U?
stretch1403 3
eat a twiki damn
TakeOneLastBreat_fml 0
OP are you Ethiopian by any chance?
qwerty8788 4
says the person with the Justin beiber photo
Nissi 17
I'm sorry, 85 pounds? What's a ten year old doing on this site?
Silent_dream 0
TIMBER!!!!!!!!!
Silent_dream 0
o yeah, btw? the person with the avenged sevenfold pic? awesome band