By sippinsoup22 - 16/02/2016 01:25 - United States - Houston

Today, my cat was being surprisingly loving towards me. Normally she ignores me so I obviously found this rather odd. She kept meowing so I assumed she was hungry. As I was getting up to feed her, she stood up and pooped all over me, my bed and phone, then turned away and ran. FML
I agree, your life sucks 19 693
You deserved it 2 443

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The classic shit-and-run. That's what I'm talking about.

Looks like you own a troll cat

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Looks like you own a troll cat

I've been distant towards my cat all day ever since I read this fml.

I don't think your cat is feline you

The classic shit-and-run. That's what I'm talking about.

You truly are a witty moron #3, still, your comment made my day. :P

#29 why did you have to call him a moron though?

because that's his user name

Lol. Moron

she's probably sick, or doesn't feel well. Cats use that kind of stuff (as gross as it is lol) to vocalize if they don't feel well. Like, "hey mom/dad I don't feel good so I'm gonna shit on you so you know." Still gross non the less, op, so fyl definitely lol. Hope your kitties ok!

That's exactly it. She came for comfort because she's not feeling well. Take the cat to the vet and she'll be back to her normal self as soon as she's healthy.

Her normal, "I don't care about you or any other humans" self in no time.

Finally, a smart person.

a literal list of reasons why cats suuuuuuuck right here.

Shit and run.

You seriously need to be more creative.

What the fuck even are cats?

Apparently they are small, furry, domesticated, carnivorous mammals that are sometimes kept as pets/domestic companions.

I agree. How could God / Mother Nature create something so damn cute yet be so fucking destructive & obnoxious? I'm not the author of "101 Uses For A Dead Cat"... but I could have been.

#6, cats are a member of the genus Felis. The species, Felis catus, is related to the lion, tiger, jaguar, and other feline mammals. They are commonly kept as pets, and have been bred into thousands of breeds. The most common type of cat is the Domestic Short/Longhair, which is the one you are most likely to come across. There is also Persians, Siamese, Ragdoll, ect... Cats are carnivores, but are sometimes found eating grass (or catnip). Like many of it's relatives, the cat has whiskers, which help it feel along in the dark. Cats also have retractable claws, unlike dogs. They can also see color, but not as well as humans can. They come in many different colors, and the patterns of their fur is classified into six basic varieties: tabby, solid, bicolor, tortoiseshell, calico/tricolor, and colorpoint.

Would a dog have done that to you?

Yes, dogs do that all the time.

nonsensical 26

I've never seen a dog do that and I had one for 12 years...

A dog might at least attempt to help clean it up by leaving shredded toilet paper everywhere ...

yes a dog would, but instead of running away he would just eat it.

I groom dogs and this happens at least once every day. Dogs are nervous poopers.

My dog got sick once and barged in my lap.

You're obviously an idiot. If you knew anything at all about animals, you'd know that the cat was seeking comfort and alerting his/her owner because he/she is not feeling well. Stop trying to glorify dogs and shut up.

#60 you're obviously being overly defensive about a shitty as little animal and feel the need to berate a human being over something that LITERALLY does not matter. you're obviously a piece of shit.

Now there is a reason why dogs are man's best friend and not cats.

coming from someone who works in a dog kennel for a living; I can definitely tell you dogs do stuff like this just like the cat did. I can't count how many times I've been peed on or projectile pooped on by small dogs that were angry at me lol.

Haha alright I can tell when I've been beat. Touché

Kind of YDI for trusting your cat when she is acting different.

Obviously she was trying to tell OP she was sick. She very possibly didn't mean to crap on OP and ran away because either she was ashamed or OP understandably could have yelled and scared her into running. Not all cats are diabolical little shits.

Maybe it's time to change that gravel print bed spread ... it may have looked nice in the store but to your cat it just looks like a giant litter box.