Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Suddenly, he grabbed my 'lower' lips and moved them in a talking motion, proclaiming that "the talking vagina declares war and wants to conquer the great penis." FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML
Superfuzz Big Muff
Today, as my boyfriend was about to go down on me, he held his breath and said, "I'm going in!" FML
Today, after going down on my boyfriend, we were cuddling and I went to kiss him. Just before I could reach his lips, he ran his finger over my mouth and whispered, "S-s-s-semen." FML
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Just as I was about to orgasm, he pulled away and said that my vagina is like a mask and that he feels like Bane from Batman. He's been talking in a Bane voice to my vagina for 30 minutes now. I guess sex is over. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML
Repetition
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. In the middle of it, he started saying in deep voice, "Enter, exit." Over and over. FML
Observation
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Right as I was really getting into it, he pauses, frowns, and says, "I think I see the pee hole." FML
Today, I watched my boyfriend have a full on conversation with his penis. He also talks to his penis nicer than he talks to me. FML
Today, as I was about to orgasm while my boyfriend was giving me oral sex, I tightened my grip on his hair and began shouting his name. He stopped, looked up at me, and said, "What?" FML
Top comments
We_Li_Ve_Fr_Ee 0
Boyfriend Win, simply put.
okieraider71 4
All that evil needs to win the day is for men of good character to do nothing. All hail the great penis.
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Comments (387)
xElizabeth13x 0
hmmm tht certainly is interestingg.... lol play with his penis like it's a light sabor then xD
ndiesal 0
Why is this a FML? YDI if you see this as a bad thing
imlagginglol 0
ROFL!
ashcov23 0
ahahahaha
mrzero 0
so your pussy can talk....he is a winner
stokebasing 0
that. Is. TheBiggestWin EVER! Buy him a beer from me
Lisimal 7
I wonder if the talking ****** started talking shit. Your boyfriend is a win!
mr_freak 1
i want know who won this war? and how long it take this war???
Velimere 0
Roast Beef Curtains: They're what's for dinner.
condemnedtodeath 0
As much as I'd like to say "what an immature b*****!". I did lol at can probably see myself doing something silly like that too.