By Anonymous - 12/04/2013 15:34 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Just as I was about to orgasm, he pulled away and said that my vagina is like a mask and that he feels like Bane from Batman. He's been talking in a Bane voice to my vagina for 30 minutes now. I guess sex is over. FML
I agree, your life sucks 66 529
You deserved it 11 819

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Why haven't you closed your legs yet? I feel as if this implies that OP is laying there with her legs open as her boyfriend plays bane with her ****** mask.


You might even say the OP's boyfriend is the Bane of orgasms...

When I read this comment first thing I think of is the darkness of the black hole we call a ******, lol

"We will destroy Gotham, then when it is done and Gotham is ashes, then you have my permission to die"...I mean ******

You merely adopted the darkenss... I was born in it... Molded by it...

Why haven't you closed your legs yet? I feel as if this implies that OP is laying there with her legs open as her boyfriend plays bane with her ****** mask.

While posting an FML, to top it all off.

Nah, not necessarily. I've been with guys that have playfully spoken to my body parts when not having sex.

RedPillSucks 31

*taps ********* Is this thing on??

#74... if you tap it just right it will be!! ^_^

BlackBlazeCobra 16

Next time you're giving him head, do the same thing with a different character.

I think OP should to the stage 5 clinger chick from wedding crashers. In the creepy voice "If you leave I'll find you!"

error404n0tf0und 21
murkinstock 5

"I'm not just going to ask for your penis... but I'm going to ask for your soooouuul" -badlipreading on youtube

Well, as long as your vj doesn't respond in the Christian Bale Batman voice then I wouldn't be too worried

"Just a little to the left. Yeah...right there. Faster! Ooh yeah baby. That's it right there..." All in Christian Bale's Batman voice.

Idancechick 4

When Gotham is in ashes.... Then you will have my permission to cum

The superhero movie trend needs to be put to rest. Then we'd have to campaign against shitty horror films.

I realize it's an unpopular opinion. However, there's just way too many of these half-assed superhero movies. They're popular because of the iconic characters and decent production values, but it must be difficult to take a household name and screw up with the amount of resources these films are allotted. They're entertaining (on some level, I'm sure), but at what cost?

I kind of agree, 28. Hardly anything original is coming out of Hollywood these days.

@32 I agree and disagree. Not everything should have to innovate a genre of movie, but the film industry is oversaturated with these garbage template movies. They know they can get away with it, too. Why play risky when you can milk guaranteed cash cows?

I'll agree that there should be fewer shitty movies, but are you trying to say that The Dark Knight Rises wasn't good? Because I don't even like Batman and I thought that movie was ******* awesome.

WrongRomance 11

The superhero fad is a bit annoying, I agree. Batman this, Batman that. It's so unoriginal, and being overused.

While not my cup of tea, I'll concede that it was well above the average hero flick. The trend of mass producing superhero movies got worse when Hollywood saw the success of The Dark Knight and Iron Man. I don't personally like either of these movies, but they deserved the money they made. Everything following (excluding The Dark Knight Rises) has been subpar and an obvious attempt to ride the wave of success.

If you're trying to compare the Christopher Nolan Batman films with, say, Michael Bay movies, that's a bad comparison and you should feel bad.

#81: No. The Avengers was a huge precedent for films; it's the first time several franchises have shared a crossover film that didn't blow. This only worked out because the franchises it combined weren't truly separate--they were deliberately set in the same "cinematic universe" in such a way that a successful crossover would be possible (i.e.: they planned to make an Avengers film from the start). I think that instead of blaming superhero movies for being shitty, you should just realize that you don't like superheroes.

It would be more accurate to just say I'm overly critical of movies or dislike trends that create an influx of average films. One of my favorite childhood shows was Justice League and I used to learn about comics through one of my friends who was really into them. But hey, I admit to speaking outside of my realm of knowledge. I'm sticking to my opinion, but on an objective level (reviews, awards, gross income), I was more wrong than right. Cheers!

KareBear7364 5

Until he stops, no more ********! That should work.

johnnyboy7 5

You don't need bjs when you have the mask!

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zahra_786 19

I keep imagining OP's boyfriend as someone from the Big Bang Theory. Howard, perhaps.

error404n0tf0und 21

You should tell him that if he likes oral sex games, he can be Bane, but that makes you Catwoman. And cats bite...