Love: Today, my boyfriend was continuously telling me how great my...

By badboyfriend101 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was continuously telling me how great my best friend smelled the other night and how I should wear some perfume that smelled like that. I have the same exact perfume and have been wearing it for months. FML

I agree, your life sucks

71815

You deserved it

4312

Favorite

Love

Season finale

Lockdown is driving us down

My body, my choice

By fatpreggo - United States

Today, I was proudly telling my husband that I only gained 8lbs through the pregnancy thus far. I usually obsess over my weight so it was a great accomplishment for me. He then turned and pinched my arms. "well it looks like all the fat migrated to your arms." FML

I agree, your life sucks

42935

You deserved it

8245

Favorite

By Noname - United States

Today, I stretched out my wedding dress on my bed so it could air out before the big day tomorrow. Later I returned to my room only to find my cat on my wedding dress, it peed on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

64211

You deserved it

20241

Favorite

By Anonymous - Nigeria - Lagos

Today, my dad was making coffee for the family. Half-way through, he excused himself to the bathroom, so for a laugh, I discreetly poured a load of salt into his drink. When he served us, I drank a mouthful and doubled over hacking. My dad barked, "I wasn't born yesterday, son." FML

I agree, your life sucks

7154

You deserved it

54472

Favorite

By Anonymous - 4/7/2020 17:01

Marxism intensifies

Today, after three weeks of suffering from COVID, I returned to work. I met with my boss, and was written up for absenteeism. Oh, and we're closing early because there are ongoing riots. Oh, and we lost the contract and I'm unemployed in three weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1576

You deserved it

240

Favorite

By photofaint - United Kingdom

Today, we had our whole staff photo. We all had to stand up in rows in height order, as I'm tall I had to stand in the middle, at the back. I'm horribly claustrophobic and ended up fainting in front of 100 colleagues, taking down 4 people around me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27179

You deserved it

3610

Favorite

By minnie - Australia

How would that work?

Today, my fiancée suggested a 'Back To The Future' - themed wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1211

You deserved it

368

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I got my first tattoo. When I showed my boyfriend, he asked where I got the design. I told him I saw it in a sketch book of his. He designed it for his last girlfriend, who got it in the same place. FML

I agree, your life sucks

20107

You deserved it

61094

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I called the guy I've liked for a long time and told him how I felt. He didn't say anything except for "hello." After I spilled my feelings, I hear "Haha, just kidding I'm not here right now! Call me back later!" FML

I agree, your life sucks

53608

You deserved it

8704

Favorite

By Reaper - South Africa

Today, after weeks of agonising, I told my best friend (who I am madly in love with) that I love her. She said: "me too, you're like a brother and a best girlfriend rolled into one!" FML

I agree, your life sucks

58668

You deserved it

5032

Favorite

By Crying - United States

Today, I started crying in class because of a sad part in the book I was reading. I got pulled out into the hallway and my male teacher asked, "Is it your special time?" FML

I agree, your life sucks

36888

You deserved it

8539

Favorite

By dontevenassk - Canada

Today, my friends decided it would be funny to scare me by tilting the portable street toilets while I was taking a dump in one of them. One of my friends accidentally rocked it too hard and it fell on the floor. They wouldn't even let me sit in the car after because I had shit all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

64017

You deserved it

3764

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I took a taxi to my hotel. I specifically said that my destination was the Hilton resort. He took me to a bed and breakfast across town. When I finally got to my hotel, I cursed him out and didn't give him a tip. I then realized I'd left my phone in the taxi after he left. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27449

You deserved it

26157

Favorite

By Trooper - United Kingdom - Caterham

Today, I saw the postman approach my house through the window, and my immediate reaction was to drop to the floor in fear. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10806

You deserved it

2283

Favorite

By duckyou

What the Duck?

Today, on the way to class, I got distracted while watching some ducks and walked face- first into a concrete pole. I ended up with a black eye and three stitches. Even the nurse laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3567

You deserved it

1310

Favorite

By fatflabbyfail - United States

Today, after having my bath, I realised that I've gotten so fat that I have to lift up my butt cheeks in order to dry underneath them. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10111

You deserved it

42208

Favorite

By Anonymous

Cool kid

Today, I found out why everyone stares at my car when I turn a corner. My power steering squeals, and it sounds like a screaming child. I don't have enough money to fix it right now. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1456

You deserved it

156

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I got stopped for shoplifting at a department store. They took me back to the security room and showed me the tapes. I was taking my own designer lipgloss that I had bought a month before out of my purse. FML

I agree, your life sucks

62113

You deserved it

4324

Favorite

By BigSister - United States

Today, my 15 year old sister came home at 4am totally stoned. My parents treated her really nicely and woke me up. I'm now grounded until I go college for being a bad influence. I volunteer at schools to talk about abusing drugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks

55921

You deserved it

3380

Favorite

By Alyssa - United States

Today, my manager mentioned that she'd hired a "cute boy" to help me out at work with paperwork. The "cute boy" was my ex-fiancé and now I have to be with him in an office for 30 some hours a week while his current fiancée brings him lunch everyday. FML

I agree, your life sucks

49683

You deserved it

3226

Favorite

By prego - Canada

Today, because I am pregnant with a weak bladder, I woke up with morning sickness and had to decide very quickly whether I wanted to vomit or pee in the toilet. I now have to clean the chunks off the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks

35440

You deserved it

5283

Favorite

By Anonymous - Sweden

Today, I woke up after a dream where I got it good from none other than Arnold Schwarzenegger. The problem? I'm a guy, and straight. Apparently my subconscious has a fetish for old Austrian bodybuilders. FML

I agree, your life sucks

32928

You deserved it

6609

Favorite

By Lukev7 - Australia

Today, was my first day at Military School. When our commander walked into the sleeping quarters, instructing us all to get up and stand at the foot of our beds. I had morning wood. To which the commander wasted no time in adressing in front of the rest of the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks

45874

You deserved it

5558

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I came home from work to find that my girlfriend had sold all of my N64 and Atari games and both the consoles and bought me a PS4 with the money. While I was standing there in shock, she kissed me on the cheek and said, "I know, I'm the greatest." FML

I agree, your life sucks

50459

You deserved it

4687

Favorite

By ali grace - United States

Today, I skipped school and stayed home without telling my parents. My mom came home on her lunch break with another man, and had sex in our living room. I'm stuck in my room, listening to my mom cheat on my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks

124237

You deserved it

17861

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend blew up at me for a comment I had made several weeks ago about not wanting kids. Then, she told me that she's pregnant. After consoling her and telling her that whatever we do, we'll do it together, she further explained that she's not sure if it's mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks

42067

You deserved it

3603

Favorite

By qtpieo1 - United States

Today, I was at the pool with two boys I baby sit. The eldest wouldn't get out of the pool so I pretended to call his dad. He then ran out of the pool, pushed me down, grabbed my phone, chucked it into the pool and then ran back into the pool. FML

I agree, your life sucks

41400

You deserved it

9702

Favorite

By Noname - United States

Today, I got up early and really put some extra effort into my appearance to catch the eye of a cute guy at work. I walked in and the woman that sits in the desk beside me looks over and says, "wow, are you sick? You're not looking too good." FML

I agree, your life sucks

43166

You deserved it

4895

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States - Northampton

Today, my daughter asked me the difference between "their" and "they're". This is the same child I've been spending thousands of dollars on to send to law school. FML

I agree, your life sucks

45614

You deserved it

6326

Favorite

By KatieElizabeth - United States - San Francisco

Today, at work, I had a customer accuse me of taking the giftcard I had issued her for her return, after spending 15 minutes trying to fix her screwed up transaction. She began to yell, and follow me around the store. Security had to intervene and I had to be locked in an office until she left. FML

I agree, your life sucks

41421

You deserved it

2715

Favorite

By sorryyouweregone - Japan - Tokyo

Today, I was at a goodbye dinner with friends before I move back to America. A friend called to cry over relationship problems she refuses to fix. While I was outside trying to politely get off the phone, my friends ate and drank everything I'd ordered and closed the bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks

35158

You deserved it

6142

Favorite

By Michelle - New Zealand

Today, I decided to quit smoking. During my lunch break, I tried to ash a KitKat bar that was in my hand after I took a bite. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30643

You deserved it

17306

Favorite

By Jules - 12/1/2021 23:07

Insurance is a scam: Tokyo drift

Today, if you have a job in my country, you automatically have health insurance. Without a job, you can get “voluntary insurance”. No, let me rephrase that: You are legally required to get “voluntary” insurance. Whether you can afford it or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks

717

You deserved it

108

Favorite

By prdept. - France

Today, I was having sex with a really hot guy. It was going great until his 6-year-old brother walked in and screamed so loudly it brought both of his parents running. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40062

You deserved it

20411

Favorite

By bad doc

Save Me

Today, I had to repeat myself multiple times and dumb down all my anatomical terms and symptoms while describing my illness to my doctor. I want to switch, but my insurance won’t cover another one for at least 60 more days. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1336

You deserved it

140

Favorite

By 11lyss1

Today, I opened my new clothing store. My only customer was my mom and the only reason she came in was to tell me that someone stole my sign. FML

I agree, your life sucks

39791

You deserved it

3535

Favorite

By Matthew

Today, during science, my friend thought it would be funny to pour corrosive acids into the reaction test I was making. I had to explain to my parents why I have no eyebrows, but the worst part is that I only got a D. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3507

You deserved it

313

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States - Modesto

Today, I found out why the parents whose children I babysit use me so often and on such short notice. It's not because they have abrupt nights out; it's because their kids hate me, and me being around is their way of punishing them. FML

I agree, your life sucks

38196

You deserved it

3763

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I called my mother to tell her that I got engaged. In the 15 minute conversation that followed, 13 were spent listening to how this is going to affect her. FML

I agree, your life sucks

45377

You deserved it

3324

Favorite

By UnpaidBabysitter - United States - New York

Today, I was shut in a boiling hot room with six children: a 10-year-old who kept shouting, a belligerent 7-year-old, two 5-year-olds who thought hitting me was funny and two 2-year-olds, who wouldn't stop crying. Their parents were just outside, laughing away, ignoring me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1580

You deserved it

175

Favorite

By Anonymous - United States

Today, my parents' divorce was finalized, and my mother decided to publicly celebrate with a bikini wax. She calls it her "Declaration of Independence". FML

I agree, your life sucks

31477

You deserved it

3077

Favorite

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By pancakelover | 0

#192569 - Tuesday 12 May 2009 23:03

Perfume can smell different on different people... Don't worry, unless he starts flirting with your friend or trying to hook up with her.

By gsfgf | 0

#192586 - Tuesday 12 May 2009 23:06

maybe he though she smelled sexy because she smelled like you.

COMMENTS

By pancakelover | 0

#192569 - Tuesday 12 May 2009 23:03

Perfume can smell different on different people... Don't worry, unless he starts flirting with your friend or trying to hook up with her.

Averizzle | 0

#835952 - Tuesday 9 February 2010 0:29

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

midorihoneybucke | 0

#919296 - Saturday 6 March 2010 19:17

fml, i had to read this piece of crap

ReyEr9412 | 0

#930855 - Wednesday 10 March 2010 2:33

Ones like these make the case for a "not an FML" button.

By oohbeads | 0

#192572 - Tuesday 12 May 2009 23:04

It could have to do with the way that your body's smell reacts to the perfume... Maybe he likes the way her body's smell reacts to the perfume better.

By gsfgf | 0

#192586 - Tuesday 12 May 2009 23:06

maybe he though she smelled sexy because she smelled like you.

By above_the_birds | 0

#192625 - Tuesday 12 May 2009 23:11

Yeah, it should be fine, like #1 said. Just maybe keep an eye on him; if he starts HITTING ON your best friend, then come back and post another FML. :D

By 2200dtn | 0

#192638 - Tuesday 12 May 2009 23:14

He's gonna hump her like a rabbit.

By shameonmedude | 0

#192642 - Tuesday 12 May 2009 23:14

Is it D&G light blue? that shit smells so gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood!

By chasing_adalia | 0

#192663 - Tuesday 12 May 2009 23:16

Then I recommend telling him, "Oh sweetie, that sounds FABULOUS. I'll wear it if you go pick me up a bottle..." Next bottle of perfume that you know you love is on him! Haha.

By redbluegreen | 40

#192671 - Tuesday 12 May 2009 23:17

Why is your boyfriend smelling other girls? Especially your best friend.

LissaMccracken | 23

#5546156 - Saturday 22 June 2013 4:44

No, why is he smelling someone at all. I mean if you smell is strong and you notice it, that's fine... But just smelling someone is kinda weird

By cs68507 | 0

#192674 - Tuesday 12 May 2009 23:19

Maybe you aren't putting on enough and/or not in the right places. There are some girls who know how to make perfume stay on them all day. Then there are some who put it on and it disappears.

By Loe_307 | 0

#192682 - Tuesday 12 May 2009 23:20

Could also be the amount you wear but probably like others have said, the reaction. Of course if you don't take a shower and toss on some perfume, that's not gonna work out too well. :P