Today, my boyfriend told me that he feels empty inside when I'm not in the kitchen. This is the most romantic thing he has said to me in the past two years. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was spending time with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. I started tearing up and telling him that I feel like he never has time for me anymore. He responded with, "I'm hungry." FML
Today, I realized my boyfriend is so seldom romantic that it actually makes me uncomfortable when he says something cute. FML
Today, my boyfriend wrote me poetry. Here's how it went: "Roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at poetry, show me your tits." That's the most romantic thing he's done for me. FML
Today, my fiancé yelled at me after I got off the phone with my friends, because I said I hadn't felt this happy and hadn't laughed this much in a long time. He was also mad that I didn't cook him dinner. He didn't ask me to cook dinner for him. He then told me to go somewhere else if I'm not happy with him. FML
Today, I had a mental breakdown after going through severe depression for several years. I told my boyfriend that everybody thinks I'm useless, to which he replied, "No you're not. You cook me good dinners." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he becomes a boring version of himself whenever we are together. FML
Today, after asking my boyfriend multiple times to be more kind and romantic, he looked at me lovingly and said, "You know, you look pretty sometimes." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me. I asked why, and he said, "Because sometimes you look good, and you buy me stuff." FML
Today, my boyfriend took me to dinner. There was a beautifully decorated table with rose petals and a huge bouquet and he told me he had ordered all this for me. I'd never felt so special. That is, until I had to get up for the couple whose table it actually was. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed: he told me the feeling he gets from being in love with me is the best feeling in the world, even better than the feeling he gets when he poops. FML
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Top comments
OhHushDear 11
That's not very romantic... that's kind of rude, actually.
ArsenalFan12 0
Lol drop him
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Comments (136)
Wederoney 16
Bitch, go make him a sandwich!
perdix 31
That could be romantic if he was in the kitchen when he said it. If he's sitting on the couch, watching footie on the telly, you need to borrow a dash of self-respect from a neighbor and find a new boyfriend.
Clarese 0
Leave his ass! Everyone deserves someone that makes them feel good. And by the sounds of it, he isn't keeping up on that part of the bargin.
gotta_love_life2 0
Single- (noun) men who make jokes about women in the kitchen.
OhHushDear 11
#38 That milk and eggs thing was pretty funny =)
DesiBoyz 14
So I guess you choose the iron when playing Monopoly ...
Mango_Splash803 1
My boyfriend says the same thing and rarely says other romantic stuff only when I'm mad
Mea022796 2
Move on
SamLiveFree_77 9
2 years and you've been putting up with this sexist douche? Time To Move on Don't you think?
murphdarkly 13
Dump his ass!