Today, my boyfriend told me that he feels empty inside when I'm not in the kitchen. This is the most romantic thing he has said to me in the past two years. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was spending time with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. I started tearing up and telling him that I feel like he never has time for me anymore. He responded with, "I'm hungry." FML
Today, I realized my boyfriend is so seldom romantic that it actually makes me uncomfortable when he says something cute. FML
Today, my boyfriend wrote me poetry. Here's how it went: "Roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at poetry, show me your tits." That's the most romantic thing he's done for me. FML
Today, my fiancé yelled at me after I got off the phone with my friends, because I said I hadn't felt this happy and hadn't laughed this much in a long time. He was also mad that I didn't cook him dinner. He didn't ask me to cook dinner for him. He then told me to go somewhere else if I'm not happy with him. FML
Today, I had a mental breakdown after going through severe depression for several years. I told my boyfriend that everybody thinks I'm useless, to which he replied, "No you're not. You cook me good dinners." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he becomes a boring version of himself whenever we are together. FML
Today, after asking my boyfriend multiple times to be more kind and romantic, he looked at me lovingly and said, "You know, you look pretty sometimes." FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me. I asked why, and he said, "Because sometimes you look good, and you buy me stuff." FML
Today, my boyfriend took me to dinner. There was a beautifully decorated table with rose petals and a huge bouquet and he told me he had ordered all this for me. I'd never felt so special. That is, until I had to get up for the couple whose table it actually was. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed: he told me the feeling he gets from being in love with me is the best feeling in the world, even better than the feeling he gets when he poops. FML
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Top comments
OhHushDear 11
That's not very romantic... that's kind of rude, actually.
ArsenalFan12 0
Lol drop him
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Comments (136)
Twitch92 7
Well..? Did you go back to the kitchen and make him a sammich? Out the most foul thing you could find in your fridge of course. Seriously though, try the line "I'm done with this shit, make your own food!" closely followed by you walking out.
Psycho_Babydoll 26
Well, come on... If you're not in the kitchen, you're not making food. If you're not making food, he can't eat. If he can't eat, he's hungry. If he's hungry, he's empty inside. Voilà, le cerle est complet.
Discombobulated9 12
What's stopping him getting off his own ass and feeding himself? Since when did guys think girls want to date someone who will act like a dependent child? Seriously, some men need to act like an adult and quit expecting others to take care of them.
FlashBurn 13
There is no problem that cannot be solved by the suitable application of high explosives. However, it cannot be recommended in this situation... Get him a fleshlight and have him get you a sybian. Practice!
FMLContinued 3
Of course he's empty when you're not in the kitchen! He's hungry! Make 'em a sammich! But seriously, that was a pretty dick thing to say.
sruhhvalo 5
That's pretty pathetic.
Vashek 2
Drop him, you deserve better then this!
Rainbow_dumpster 28
Are you ******* kidding me?? OMG, You need to dump his ass, OP. He obviously sounds like a SEXIST Bastard. P.S. I have a feeling that comments might close if this issue gets much worse. :S
adorkable90 0
dump that douche bag
crazyaces89 7
It's as annoying as the "go bake a cake" comment
bacon_ftw 5
You've sure got a keeper- I dont think anyone can top his doucheness. Hats off to him.