Today, my boyfriend poked me on Facebook. I got excited because this is as close as he's come to touching me in weeks. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I logged onto facebook, and saw that one of my friends had just listed herself as in a relationship. I was happy for her, so I clicked the "like" button. Then I went to her page to see who her new boyfriend was. It was my boyfriend. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend added his ex on Facebook and Instagram, all within a few days. Lucky me. FML
Today, I posted a picture of my boyfriend and I kissing on facebook. He untagged himself. FML
Today, I was scrolling through my Facebook newsfeed and I noticed my boyfriend had commented on a post. It said, "Tag the hottest girl you know". Yeah, he tagged his ex. FML
Today, I found my boyfriend's Facebook page. I also found his wife's. FML
Today, after my boyfriend ignored me for hours playing video games, he gave me some attention for a little bit. When I tried to run my fingers through his hair, I missed and punched him in the face. FML
Today, the girl my boyfriend cheated on me with posted pics of them kissing on Facebook, and tagged me in them. FML
Today, my boyfriend thought it appropriate to let me know that doing the "duck face" in my Facebook pictures "highlights my mustache." FML
Today, after feeling fat and ugly and a bit depressed, I logged on to Facebook to see my boyfriend had posted "I have the most beautiful girlfriend in the world!" I 'liked' it and commented "Aww thank you baby!" I logged in later to see that he commented back saying "I didn't mean you." FML
Today, I logged onto Facebook to find out that my boyfriend is now listed as single. News to me. FML
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Top comments
bettyc4 26
Time for ... The Talk
Madrias 36
Facebook + Excited = instant YDI from me.
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Comments (123)
Imachillifilliz 2
Don't feel too terrible, I had one like that. I was in 8th grade, so it wasn't really a "relationship" but he'd pass me in the halls and just wave and keep going. He also cried when I dumped him. But in your case, you should evaluate the relationship further. Sorry of I'm not making sense, i am very much so sleep deprived.
GoW_Chick 15
WTF?! *creeper alert*
Enslaved 38
Haha, the OP's name, "Skullie" reminds me of what one of my associates calls it when his wife gives him head on birthday occasions.
perdix 31
You need to let him know that 3/14 is coming up, Steak and ******* Day. To me, 3.14 is Pi Day -- maybe things can be different this year ;)
Enslaved 38
If I didn't know you better, I'd say you were making that up..... Research says otherwise. So I will ask, how did you do "your" research. I used google. Lol countdown to zero.:P
perdix 31
Well, pi = 3.1415926. . . I take the first three digits, 3.14, which can be translated at March 14. Real nerds celebrate the moment at 3:49:20.5 AM, if you carry it out to more significant figures (or 3:09:26 PM, in some opinions.) Uber-nerds make sure it's on Greek time, where the concept of pi was invented. Does that answer your question?
Enslaved 38
3/14- Pi and BJ's? Good thing it falls on hump day this year.
perdix 31
Well, the Pi day makes sense to me, but the Steak and ******* Day seems like a possible hoax and I'll need to do further investigation. I'm going to need a research assistant . . .
TrippingOnAcid 29
Awh, neglect :(
perdix 31
I thought for sure that line was going to work! But as #53 shows, it doesn't test well with real, live girls. Back to the ol' drawing board. #48, try "And pinch yo *******." Good luck and let me know how that works.
McNerdyNerd 8
Just stalk him somewhere completely random, then ninja glomp him :) and then have a serious conversation afterwards.
SweetPerfectionn 3
Why is he your boyfriend again..?
hahaleym 0
I touch my girl friend, everyday.????????????????????????
periwinkle95 10
We don't care. ??????????????????????????
julialinn 2
And why are you still with him?
matildatilda 0
So he asked u out right. O dat is just rong