Today, my boyfriend confessed that he felt so insecure he submerged my $80 vibrator in water to eliminate the competition. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend confessed that after every fight we have, he dips my toothbrush in the toilet. FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me for "cheating" on him by using a vibrator. FML
Today, my boyfriend started freaking out about how his penis floats in water. Baths with him will never be the same again. FML
Today, I caught my boyfriend in the bathtub interrogating his penis and "drowning" it when it wouldn't answer him. FML
Today, my husband got jealous of my new vibrator. I got the vibrator to "spice things up" between us, because he hasn't touched me in months. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he started shaking really hard. When I asked him what he was doing, he simply said, "I want to be better than your vibrator!" FML
Today, my mother said I'm slipping too deep into depression since my boyfriend left for college in Fresno. Her solution? Buying me a vibrator. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I realized that the vibrator we bought got sent to his parents house. He picked it up from them, brought it home, and we discovered that they had already opened the package. They even tried to hide the evidence by re-taping it. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend secretly purchased a vibrator and has been using it for the past two weeks. When I confronted her, her only argument was "It's made me cum more times than you could." FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were in bed after a long stretch of abstinence, finally heating things up. I went to the wardrobe to grab the vibrator (I love using it on her) and slowly revealed it: mold-covered, an absolute biohazard. The night ended with me fixing a leak behind the wardrobe. FML
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Top comments
Mirorbo 27
I really wish people would get a clue and stop comparing sex to vibrators. They're two completely different things that give different form of stimulation. Toys are not replacements for actual sex.
CoachLlama 5
Headline - "Jealous lover tries to drown competition after getting bad vibe."
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Comments (169)
honeybunches88 5
If the vibrator wasn't water resistant, wouldn't it have stopped working after OP used it a few times?
AwesomeWillv1 0
I think there's a difference between a bit of female juices and being completely submerged in water.
AceArctic 4
I'd be kinda pissed too if I have to compete with a hunk of plastic and metal!
karmabyproxy 5
What a dick!!! He masturbates and looks at ****. Maybe he should be insecure since he's such a loser. Dump his ass.
weissesengel 0
aww thats cute!
moshpointoh 0
@2 your a ****
hurricanebetsyy 0
why wouldn't you have a water proof vibrator?
bvbsoldier 0
um... you have (er, had) a vibrator? an your boyfriend knew about it? kinda creepy...
MuZh 1
Wait, what? How is that creepy...?
rockinroyalty 0
awwwn lol he's so cute :)
angbabii36 0
y do you have an $80 vibrator in the first place?!
chyeaa_bri 12
his insecurity is cute in a way(: but i'm sorry OP ):