What the hell does he put in his salad?

Eyes.

burnt chicken??????

lettuce?

I know thats not what happens when I eat lettuce. But that may be because I don't eat lettuce...

Hopefully OP's eye's aren't hazel?

Hopefully OP's eye's aren't hazel?

Who eats salad?! I just pick the bacon bits out.

The fuck? That was a period.

Green eggs and ham

Believe it or not, OP has purple eyes. Her boyfriend just has colon issues.

12 - You made me literally laugh out loud, thanks :) And yeah OP's bf is pretty gross

You don't make friends with salad!!

I guess I'll have to go eat a salad because I have no idea what color that could be.

OP's eyes are the color of an ocean after a storm... Beautiful!

OP's eyes are the color of an ocean after a storm... Beautiful!

OP's eyes are the color of an ocean after a storm... Beautiful!

53- No problamo.

Penis

Stop stealing pictures from a legendary commenter. Be original please.

Shroooooooommmmmmmssssss (RAINBOW)

No the question is what doesn't he put in his salad?

You've clearly never done shrooms, that is not at all what it's like.

Great fucking comment , you sir deserve a "I see what you did there"

purple food coloring. my brother drank a grape slushy once and it turned green. not something I wanna see again.

Meth is a hell of a drug

I'm genuinely surprised nobody has said "that's a shitty situation".

That's a shitty situation.

Come on now, #12. He's not unreasonable…

131 - Why were you looking at your brother's poop?

I think what he really means is "when I toss someones salad".

172- long story I have not the time nor the stomach to tell

Really?

Oh my god! The first comment I see, and you made me die laughing!!!

How romantic...!

*Cricket*

Does that say Cheesy Poofs?

87- yes c:

87- that's what my sister calls them, even though I have never heard of that brand, only cheese puffs

lmao random ass fml

Well...that's just disgusting...and random...make up something just as gross for him :D

You're so full of shit your eyes are brown

The schnauzberries taste like schnauzberries!!

Haha! Right,, Like have her say: "Your penis is shaped like my shits; the only difference would be that my shits are longer!" ;D

WindowLicker, The caption for your photo reads: Firefox has encountered a problem with windows.

#163-Lmao that comment just made my day

Awww.. Im sorry

Apology accepted

Speak for yourself bro, I'm still pissed.

I wasnt apologizing to anyone but the OP

So you have a nice greeny/ brown eyes? Good to know.

Oh crap.....!!!!! Sorry couldn't resist that one

There's also the possibility his shit is blue

greeny brown eyes are also known as hazel eyes for future reference.

Not unless he pours bleu-cheese dressing over the salad.

I can honestly say I don't think I've ever shat green brown Dx

Awww you sound like you have a lovely boyfriend it was meant to be

Isn't that just wonderful. You eyes are being compared to shit. What a wonderful boyfriend you have.

Your eyes are as brown as....yeah, there's really not anything else that fits there.

Your eyes are as brown as...chocolate?

poop.

16- your eyes are as brown as the earth beneath my feet. I'm reminded if them every time i sip my morning coffee. rich chocolate cake in the bakers window does not begin to compare to those beautiful stars you call eyes. it's all in how you hold yourself

How sweet.. Its the thought that counts..?

Eh hem. There's this new fancy thing called SARCASM, which is obviously used here. You should try understanding it before thumbing a comment down. 'kay?

Haha, he's a keeper :)

Most original comment ever.

That's a Beary nice picture you have there.

108- don't you just love Harry Potter humor?

108 i saw what you did bhere

Ahh, nothing better in my opinion, Fellow Harry Potter fan.

I'm not sure, but I'm guessing that your eyes are not blue.

They're obviously purple! Read the other comments silly!

#73 yea.. cause that comment was SO there at the time, damn.. purple..