Today, my aunt and uncle stole $584 from me, since I'm moving out. Their reasoning? I stole things. When I asked what I'd stolen, my aunt looked me straight in the eye and said "Milk Duds." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my grandma calls me, accusing me of theft. I was home all day and watching Orange Is The New Black. When I asked what I stole, she said her car keys. I don’t even have my license. I told her to look in her purse. She found them. FML
Today, I was so ashamed of being broke that instead of asking my parents for money, I snuck into their house while they were at work to steal some of their food. FML
Today, I discovered that my parents rooted through our house looking for junk to sell at a garage sale. They sold all of my books from my bookshelf. When I freaked, out my mom said 'well you never read them'. There was about $300 hidden between the pages of those books. They made $60. FML
Today, I found out why I haven't been getting my bank statements for the past couple of months. My parents have been hiding them from me, because they've been stealing from it. FML
Today, I caught my husband's crazy aunt attempting to steal from my daughter's piggy bank. When I confronted her, she tried to defend herself by saying, "She's 2 months-old, she doesn't need the money!" FML
Today, I got caught stealing lollies. I am 25. FML
Today, I caught my sister taking money from my wallet. When I confronted her, she claimed that she was actually putting back money that she had stolen earlier. She doesn't understand the irony. FML
Today, my house was broken into. Apparently, I have nothing good enough in my house to steal, so they took my cake. FML
Today, I finally confronted my mom for robbing me of my inheritance from my dad. Apparently she was justified in taking it because she "needed it to raise me" and "to keep a roof over our heads" as I was growing up. As a result, I'm an adult with no nest egg whatsoever. FML
Today, I slipped money into my mother's purse after she refused to let me pay for lunch. She caught me in the act and thought I was stealing money from her instead. FML
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Top comments
Skiddywompus 0
The ****? How dare you steal their milk duds!
Denikk 0
What a lovely family...
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Comments (154)
HeyImJuli 3
Call the cops, we hav a real burglary here *sarcasm*
Tennispro349 2
epic fail
ImmortalRiot 1
Yeah, how would you like it if someone stole 600 bucks from you? Jackass.
ADOG2645 17
I hope the cops hav got there soon
RoseCrystal 17
I hope you called the cops or something.
blondie1208 17
milk duds are some serious shit.
incrapper 7
I would have punched her husband dead in the face then taken more milk duds
yadisingh 5
What about the money?
Bethhh13 1
If someone stole my candy I'd be upset too!!
iianalove987 7
Same, but not at the same level as her aunt and uncle. :o
duckman9 55
the question is: would you be $500 angry, or more like kiss-and-make-up angry? coz there's a big difference...
Noob30 0
You stole Milk Duds?! Holy shit bro, you deserved it.
IWATCHYOUSLEEP 7
:D
yzf250rider88 2
So steal it back from them
CoverBoy 14
Ever seen the naked Milk duds advertisement? That's some serious stuff.
hannahmorgan06 7
milk duds are freaking awesome. you totally deserved it. hahahah :)
incrapper 7
and u deserve all the dislikes
hannahmorgan06 7
take a joke, dude.
Socalledproblem 5
I actually busted out laughing, FYL.