Money: Today, it's my birthday, and my present is that my mom is coming... - FML

By MrFerret - 06/05/2011 03:41

Today, it's my birthday, and my present is that my mom is coming over to see me so that she can borrow three hundred dollars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 701

You deserved it 3 395

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 03/03/2011 14:21 - United Kingdom

Today, it's my birthday. My parents, with whom I live, told me that they didn't get me anything, but instead they said they would knock off a bit of the housekeeping I owe them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 131

You deserved it 8 324

By bannana0zoom - 03/03/2012 08:06 - Canada

Today, it's my birthday. My mom got me a gym membership and a bunch of clothes that are a few sizes too small. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 011

You deserved it 7 973

Priorities

By Anonymous - 09/07/2021 13:01 - United States - Floral Park

Today, my mother flipped out that I spent $20 on a gift for myself for my birthday. Instead of getting a gift for me, she spent $300 on a new vacuum cleaner, and claims that we didn't have enough left in our budget to spend on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 976

You deserved it 120

Mix up

By Trew Love - 03/05/2016 06:25 - Canada - Fort Saint John

Today, it's my birthday. I called my mom to thank her for the gift she'd sent. She was surprised and said, "Oh I thought you were waiting to open it." She ended the conversation with, "OK, I'll call you on your birthday." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 152

You deserved it 1 364

Partyblocked

By story of my life - 07/03/2022 02:00

Today, it's my birthday. I'd asked my mom weeks ago if she could watch my kids, so my husband and I could go celebrate. She told me an hour before we were supposed to leave I'd have to reschedule, so she could watch my brother's kids while he goes out for fun. Gee, thanks mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 442

You deserved it 99

By crookedteeth - 27/08/2009 17:23 - United States

Today, for my birthday, my mom presented me with a $4,000 check to pay for my braces. I've been very self-conscious about my teeth for years. Everyone applauded and told me how happy they were for me. Later, my mom asked me for the check back. Apparently it was just meant to make her look good. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 312

You deserved it 2 827

Life is a roller coaster

By Username - 02/10/2019 14:00

Today, it's my birthday and my mom took me and some friends to an amusement park. Looking for a tampon, I found a phone in my mom's purse that I didn't recognize. Turns out my mom is cheating on my dad. Happy birthday to me, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 866

You deserved it 171

By mybmw - 14/10/2009 10:39 - United States

Today, was my mom's birthday. I recently got my first job, thanks to her, and could finally afford to buy her something nice. I spent my first paycheck ever on buying her a very nice bracelet. She said it was nice, then asked if I would mind if she exchanged it for one she actually liked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 004

You deserved it 4 430

By Anonymous - 21/07/2011 16:40 - United States

Today, I missed a call from my mom. It's my birthday, and glad she remembered, I called back to thank her. She was surprised when I brought up going out for dinner, and asked me what the occasion was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 692

You deserved it 2 770

By Poor Student - 05/12/2011 22:30 - Canada

Today, my mother "borrowed" money from my stash to help pay for her vacation to the Dominican Republic. The same trip I'm not allowed to go on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 452

You deserved it 2 574

Next

Top comments

CareFace 16

Friday 6 May 2011 8:56

Best present EVARRR. That's the price you gotta pay for putting her naughty spot in a world of pain. :)

MarkFeehily 0

Friday 6 May 2011 8:57

happy birthday! :D

Comments

HeavyMetalViking 0

Friday 6 May 2011 10:29

Your mom is great. She actually thought of borrowing 1000 bucks, but decided to 'give' you 700 back.

narcosoldier 2

Friday 6 May 2011 10:42

three hundred pennies

prismis 0

Friday 6 May 2011 17:51

if pennies were equal to a dollar maybe. but she wants $300 not $3

haileemarie7 6

Friday 6 May 2011 11:10

I hate it when people say that. I'm about to get thumbed down, but, she opened her legs. she knew what she was getting into. he didn't ask to be brought into this world. he doesn't owe her anything.

dgr8ing 0

Friday 6 May 2011 11:15

THUMBED UP HELL YEAH

HeavyMetalViking 0

Friday 6 May 2011 12:23

48 you cunning troll. :)

justin1104lee 0

Friday 6 May 2011 11:11

at least she showed up on ur birthday, I bet the $300 got u a "happy birthday" from her! and btw, happy birthday!

kaasbroodje 0

Friday 6 May 2011 11:40

that sucks realy hard

almira_fml 5

Friday 6 May 2011 11:46

well she spent on u till the age u could earn those money...payback time....

fml_psl 0

Friday 6 May 2011 12:03

Ohh.

Lisa89 3

Friday 6 May 2011 12:15

Just say no?

shenaniganry 3

Friday 6 May 2011 14:40

epic default.

Bcfrmkc816 17

Friday 6 May 2011 12:19

well you should be proud to GIVE her the Monet since after all she spent a he'll of alot more raising you and taking care of you

RavenNight 0

Friday 6 May 2011 13:42

if u have such a problem theres a word called no. might wanna try cuz personally i'd rather keep $300 then lose it

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Keywords

Work Management Awkward Miscellaneous Friends Healthy Lifestyle Health Relatable Mother in law Gifts Birthday Family Money Public freakouts Education Parents Pranks Students Exams Weird Love AITA Argument Fear Insects Skincare Cats Job interview Jealousy Gross

The Top

Today, I was scrolling through a more risqué/dark/dirty humor Facebook page. I thoughtlessly set my phone down to help my cousin with a translation for about a minute. When I went to grab my phone, I saw, front and center, a photo edit of Chewbacca with his "lipstick" out. No wonder she kept glancing down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70

You deserved it 420

Today, I came home from work to see a pair of panties I hadn't worn lying on the floor. I picked them up and they were all crunchy. It turns out that while I'm away, my boyfriend uses my underwear as a vessel for his semen. He claims this is normal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 396

You deserved it 362

The Top

Today, while housesitting my neighbor's dogs the phone rang. I answered it and a voice said, "Stop checking your Facebook and take care of my dogs. They look like they need to go out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 303

You deserved it 33 055

Today, I called a possible employer I had an interview with about a week ago to see if I had got the job that I have already been trained for. Her response? "Are you sure I interviewed you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 540

You deserved it 3 043

Today, my mom called me a druggie after she found out I smoked weed once. She's now threatening to sell my car, tell my boss, and ban me from seeing my fiancée. I'm 24. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 254

You deserved it 3 914

Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 076

You deserved it 4 184

Today, my mom got genuinely angry at me because I refused to let her pop a zit that I had "promised" she could pop a few days back. She said with utmost look of disappointment that I'm "not a man of my word". FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 338

You deserved it 5 758

Today, I got lost trying to find the hospital my sister was giving birth in. I stopped at a store to call my mom for directions. A cop pulled up beside me and knocked loudly on my window asking me to get out. The store had been robbed and I am now a suspect. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 899

You deserved it 2 540