Today, it's my 26th birthday. My girlfriend gave me a matchbox car, a glow necklace, and a squirt gun. For her birthday, I bought her a new dress, rented a limo, and took her around to bar hop with her friends. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, it was the girl of my dreams' birthday. She already knows I am totally in love with her. So for her birthday I decided to buy her a $60 dollar bottle of rum for her and her friends to have fun with. She picked it up from my house with her new boyfriend waiting in the car. FML
Today, it was my 16th birthday. My surprise was a new car, that is now in the side of the garage because my mom lost control while driving it around front. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My wife took me to my favorite restaurant for dinner. She made me pay for my birthday dinner, along with hers. She also got me a gift card to HER favorite store. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me the present she'd bought for me. I said, joking, "I hope it's not a tie!" It was a tie. FML
Today, it's my sixteenth birthday and my mom promised me she'd buy me a car. She came home with a toy lego car. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My fiancé decided to give me the gift of "freedom." That's how he put it, anyway. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend had promised that the day would belong to me. But no, I had to drive 80km forth and back to pick him up from work, then he took pictures with his new camera lens, then he decided what to eat, demanded a massage, and then he just fell asleep. Happy birthday to me. FML
Today, it's my 17th birthday. I asked for a newer car because my car right now sucks. I got a book on photography. I don't own a camera. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend took me to dinner and near the end, he pulled out a long, rectangular box. Thinking it was a necklace, I got very excited. It was a wand. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me a Paul Frank t-shirt. It says "I'm single." FML
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Top comments
SAgirl 24
You're her sugar daddy, not her BF.
kman1759 7
if this was flipped and the boy was given the squirt gun and the girl was giving the limo everyones opinions would be completely different.
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Comments (164)
KGambii 0
Looks like she belongs on MLIA...
mz_booty 0
it's the throught that count!!! lol jk dumb that biach :)
mz_booty 0
dump**
oliver86 8
you seem to correct yourself a lot
mz_booty 0
I know I should reread it before I send!!
kman1759 7
if this was flipped and the boy was given the squirt gun and the girl was giving the limo everyones opinions would be completely different.
rique2008 10
I know right? they say to suck it up to the guy, and if it was the exact same thing but the girl instead you would see the comment page flooded with "dump him" comments. oh well that's just people for you.
ImaginaryFoe 1
What a stupid generalisation. There have been FMLs written by women complaining of similar situations and it was just as divided between "dump him" and "it's the thought that counts".
ShadyFTW1 0
22, that is definitely false. Those FMLs are more along the lines of "Get in the kitchen and make him a sandwich!"
zenti 2
Yeah, my opinion would be slightly different. I would be asking, "Why is your boyfriend giving you a matchbox car and a squirt gun?"
CiaranPM 0
Embrace the Mcguyver within; you could build a ******* tank, OP.
lookALIVEsunshin_fml 1
Win. On so many levels. (:
stevenmx86 8
When you buy a gift you're not supposed to expect the same in return... Ydi for buying her a stupid expensive gift in the first place..
ImaginaryFoe 1
Why do so many people do this? What do you think would've been a fair exchange? People are different - different ideas, different financial situations. It seems like she was creatively telling you she can't afford a real car but you two can make your own rave. Stop complaining about what you didn't get unless you want to lose what you have.
akaashR 0
hey man I mean she obviously tries to buy worthless crap and hopes you find meaning in it. I mean if she doesn't give a crap about the presents she gives you.. does she give a crap about you?
BadasS14 0
Bingo!!! lol who the fukk says Bingo! anymore?!! lol
CaptSkippy 9
No birthday SEX?!?! oh noes! D:
bman134 0
I know right she could at least give him a *******
shannavanleeuwen 0
those are ****** AWESOME presents! I wish I still got cool shit like that!
prinzess_fml 25
Well, if that's the way you think, here's an idea: next time, as your bday present, ask her to give you money, for the exact amount you spent for her bday present. Then you'd be happy? It's not her fault if you're an overachiever.