Miscellaneous: Today, I woke up and rolled out of bed. I'm on the top mattress... - FML

By Anonymous - 30/11/2009 21:35 - United States

Today, I woke up and rolled out of bed. I'm on the top mattress of a bunk bed. We have tile floors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 799

You deserved it 8 678

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/07/2016 00:56 - Canada - Concord

Today, I fell off the top of my bunk bed in my sleep onto a running fan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 166

You deserved it 1 570

By Anonymous - 25/08/2016 00:36 - United States - Westerville

Today, I need a new mattress. Last night, I slept on the floor. It was the best sleep I've had in a while. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 749

You deserved it 1 022

By Anonymous - 02/03/2018 19:30 - United States

Today, I woke up after being sick from the flu and tried to get out of bed. I forgot I was in a bunk bed and broke my ankle in the fall down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 329

You deserved it 853

By Anonymous - 10/07/2019 16:00

Today, I woke up with a carpet burn. From sleeping. Alone. In my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 556

You deserved it 162

Support

By CallmeTokey - 12/07/2016 03:21

Today, as I was laying on the bottom part of my bunk bed, I noticed a beam on the underside of the top bunk that seemed to have no place being there, so I tried to find out what it was. I soon discovered it was to support the bed after it promptly collapsed on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 638

You deserved it 15 338

Knackered

By Anonymous - 27/02/2012 12:36 - Australia

Today, I was very cold and tired, so I took a shower to warm up and went to bed. The minute I hopped into bed, it collapsed and broke. I have spent half-an-hour rearranging furniture to get the mattress on to the floor. Now I'm cold again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 301

You deserved it 3 275

Creeped out

By Seline - 25/11/2010 14:48

Today, I woke up on the top bunk of my bed with the birds chirping. I felt so energized, I gave a big stretch, and my hand hit the ceiling. I accidentally pushed the ceiling board up and lots of tiny spiders fell on me and my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 607

You deserved it 4 321

By ayye_its_nikki - 19/12/2012 05:07 - United States - Cedar Park

Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 538

You deserved it 21 349

By Anonymous - 26/12/2012 04:56 - United States - Medina

Today, I woke up on my boyfriend's bedroom floor. When I asked him why I was there, he said I'd gotten too hot, so he rolled me off his bed. I have the flu and a fever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 619

You deserved it 3 783

By Anonymous - 27/04/2012 15:22 - United States - Pleasant Hill

Today, I woke up, got up, and felt something crunchy under my feet. My son thought it would be funny if he spread cat litter all around the house. Used cat litter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 307

You deserved it 2 576

Next

Top comments

jessxoxo28 5

Tuesday 1 December 2009 2:24

lmao, sounds like that hurt like hell :)

oh_dee 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 2:21

OUCH.

Comments

a_nix777 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 3:27

ouch! I've done that before although I manage to sleep through it.

alex_vik 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 3:31

I'm surprised how many people on here roll out of bed. Wouldn't falling out of bed hurt, even if it's a 2-3 foot drop?

Lisa89 3

Tuesday 1 December 2009 3:39

YOUCH!

katiewubsmusic 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 3:40

Vivid dreams? ;D

katiewubsmusic 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 3:41

JCadle90 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 3:53

hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!

Houndourpup 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 3:56

Mabey the tiled floor has a drain in the middle of the room, no windows, and chainsaws.

joemk2012 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 4:10

I can relate. I was on vacation with my family, and I'm a sleepwalker, so I tried sleepwalking - off the top bunk. And my head hit the nightstand. The worse part was I was still partly asleep, which made me even more panicked and disoriented.

Flipps 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 4:10

I have tiled carpet tho since where I live it rains ALOT and water started seeping under the carpet, and no lie, a mini tree started growing in the corner of my room, lol

Man_person 0

Tuesday 1 December 2009 4:20

bull mo fo

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8

Keywords

Embarrassing Transportation Awkward Cars Family Babysitter Relatable Kids Thief Money Health Depression Mental health Wanker Work Bodyshaming Love Vacation Annoying Students Parenting Intimacy First Dates AITA Singing Animals Cats Weddings Public freakouts Cops

The Top

CLICK HERE TO SEE THE ILLUSTRATED FMLMeghan's website : http://www.kawaiinot.com/ & http://www.murphypop.com/ If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. Bu...

I agree, your life sucks 1

You deserved it 1

Today, after work, I was saying goodbye to my last remaining friend I worked with because she was going to be leaving for college. My manager saw me talking and made me clock back in and work, because, "If you have time to talk, you have time to work." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 643

You deserved it 1 249

The Top

Today, I was reprimanded by my mom and her current man over my opinions on one of their church social friend's "homemade" lasagna. I didn't say anything, just took one bite, and ate no more. How politely do you say that you know full well she shoved Stouffer's frozen lasagna into the oven? I recognized it from just the smell! FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 145

Today, my company decided to give me a second role, since I’m "the best performing candidate.” When I turned it down, they asked me to work half-time instead. I quit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 895

You deserved it 114

Today, I was home alone while my mom went out to dinner. I decided to hop in the shower, and I noticed my mom left her douche in there. After, I texted her telling her what I found and that it was gross. Her response? "It's not gross. It came from my vagina, like you and your sister." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 985

You deserved it 23 319

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. His father was completely wasted, his mom was high, and his 11-year-old sister was talking about her favorite alcoholic drinks at the dinner table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 077

You deserved it 3 300

Today, police questioned me on behalf of my doctor, who couldn’t believe one person could use so much insulin, so he thinks I’m selling it to bodybuilders. I really do use it all myself, I use about 6 times as much as my sister who is also diabetic, and my diet is normal. I only weigh 10.5 stone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 490

You deserved it 109

Today, I have done enough trials to confirm that I puke after each time I have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 635

You deserved it 4 531