Intimacy: Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I...

By embarrassed - 18/08/2014 16:39 - United States - Great Neck

Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 651

You deserved it 20 521

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Same thing different taste

Baller move

By notafan - 07/08/2019 00:01 - United States

Today, I was at a baseball game. This kid in front of me had binoculars and was constantly shouting. Trying to amuse the girl next to me, I leaned over and said, "That kid probably has wet dreams about baseball." She got up and said to the kid, "Come on honey, we're leaving." FML

I agree, your life sucks 579

You deserved it 3 577

By sometingwong - 01/12/2011 20:32 - United States

Today, I had dinner at my girlfriend's house with her parents. Everything was going great, until after dinner when her dad pulled me aside and told me he'd heard us having sex. I was out of town all weekend for a baseball tournament. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 438

You deserved it 3 455

Watch your step

By the guy that didn't get his kiss - 25/06/2021 16:01

Today, while at a football game, I had my arm around my girlfriend. We were really close and I was just about to kiss her when suddenly her phone rang. It was her dad, telling her he's watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 981

You deserved it 158

Not now, Cooper

By Me. - 27/10/2011 06:40 - United States

Today, I got a boner at the dentist's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 029

You deserved it 8 878

By Keith walk - 12/02/2011 05:59 - United States

Today, my girlfriend's parents walked in on us having sex. Not only did her dad make me walk out to my truck with no clothes on, he is my baseball coach and I will be seeing him on Monday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 318

You deserved it 22 959

By Username - 08/07/2011 13:24 - United States

Today, I went to an amateur baseball game with some family and friends. When our team hit a home run, my grandpa took it upon himself to start screaming wildly, removing his prosthetic leg and waving it jubilantly in the air. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 615

You deserved it 5 621

Smooth talker

By ugh - 31/01/2012 00:25 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 003

You deserved it 5 616

He bangs the drums

By PhilDavisDied? - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - France

Today, after pulling up to my girlfriend's house for dinner with her parents, one of my favorite songs begin to play on the radio. After my 3 minutes of air drumming, I look up to see my girlfriend and her parents bouncing with laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 266

You deserved it 35 478

Whenever

By InstantHardOn - 08/11/2011 04:43 - United States

Today, my girlfriend has a new obsession: grabbing my junk and whispering in my ear the song, "Baby, Imma Be Your Motivation." Problem? I get an instant boner and she only does it in public, because it's "funny as hell." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 577

You deserved it 8 165

By Soundofaboner - 23/04/2013 16:08 - United States

Today, while practicing a song in choir, I got a boner. Trying to cover it up, I tried sitting down. My choir teacher got mad and made me stand in front of the whole class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 450

You deserved it 10 117

ShadowlessSpear 21

Monday 18 August 2014 22:40

Hopefully he didnt ask what it was and poke it.

imlifeless2 25

Monday 18 August 2014 22:44

Oh say, can you see? By my dick's early rise...

Comments

harley1077 9

Tuesday 19 August 2014 21:35

and the Rockets red glare...

Steve95401 49

Tuesday 19 August 2014 22:21

O, say can you see The boner of OP.

musicmanbilly 8

Wednesday 20 August 2014 8:53

That was wild from start to finish.

annarcheer 19

Wednesday 20 August 2014 16:39

you just made my day.

alchemist0 4

Thursday 21 August 2014 0:21

A patriotic boner

Fuzy2K 7

Thursday 21 August 2014 8:18

"Everybody rise for the National Anthem..."

Althaltefolie 13

Thursday 21 August 2014 10:54

Well that's one proud american.

blue5394 3

Thursday 21 August 2014 11:25

ferreal?? that's the song you chose?-.- smh..

jcast0627 9

Thursday 21 August 2014 13:25

You have no idea how hard I am laughing.

Saraishi 25

Thursday 21 August 2014 21:28

Pavlov's dog at it's best.

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I accidentally pulled out six of my eyelashes. It's noticeable. Very noticeable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 452

You deserved it 392

Today, my mom stopped playing badminton with me because she claimed I was too aggressive. Apparently winning, playing by the rules, and smashing is considered aggressive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 416

You deserved it 8 119

Today, my girlfriend started bitching me out about how public proposals are unfair and how they pressure a girl to say yes. All I did was get on my knee to tie a loose shoelace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 506

You deserved it 3 404

Today, I got a letter confirming I had dropped out of college. I received this letter shortly after completing the 10th essay I had finished this week as a result of me deciding to finally apply myself to my schoolwork. Turns out that while dropping a class, I checked Drop All instead of Drop 1. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 611

You deserved it 41 978

Today, at the request of my girlfriend, I took a ruler with me into the shower to measure myself. Later on, at the dinner table, my mom asked me, "so, how big is it?" I had forgotten to take the ruler out of the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 338

You deserved it 5 649

Today, as I was getting out of the car, my 7-year-old son opened the door for me. I thought it was very gentlemanly of him to do that, until he smashed my thumb with the car door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 025

You deserved it 1 341