Today, I went out for a smoke break. A homeless person walks up to me and asks for a cig. As I pull out my pack he says "Oh... Menthols... no I don't smoke that cheap shit". I was called cheap by a hobo. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was walking past a homeless guy while smoking; he asked if he could have a cigarette. So I gave him one and said without thinking, "Sorry, it’s a menthol, but beggars can't be choosers." FML
Generous
Today, a homeless guy asked me for a cigarette. Knowing that I only had a couple left in my pack, I gave it to him. He opened it, took one out and thanked me profusely. A bit surprised, I went on my way. Oh yeah, that's right, the pack contained the money I'd withdrawn from an ATM. FML
Today, I saw a homeless man on the street and decided to give him the dollar bill I had left in my wallet. He said "Thank you" then as I turned to walk away, he muttered "Cheap-ass cunt". FML
Get back here
Today, a man in a hurry asked me for a light. Not being able to find my lighter amongst the muddle inside my handbag, I handed him my lit cigarette so he could light his. He took it from me, started smoking it and walked off. FML
Today, I had my cigs tucked into my waistband because my shorts didn't have pockets. A friend walks up and asks for a smoke. I say "I've got something you can smoke right here", tugging at my shorts. The "friend" then kicks me in the nuts for being a douche. FML
With friends like these…
Today, I stayed with a friend because I was recently kicked out of my home and had nowhere to go. When I went out for job applications, she asked, "Can you pick me up a pack of smokes?" and then got mad that I didn't have the money, calling me selfish. FML
Today, I was at a bar and met this great guy. He was going outside for a smoke and I wanted to go too. Since I don't smoke, I decided to borrow one of my friends cigarettes as an excuse to go outside with him. As I was lighting the cigarette, he pointed out that I was lighting the wrong end. FML
Today, while walking down the street, a homeless man walked up to me. He opened his mouth to say something and I immediately said that I didn't have any spare change because I was late for work. He then said "I was gonna ask you for the time, dickwad". Apparently he wasn't homeless. FML
Catch
Today, I was walking through town when a rough looking woman asked me for a cigarette. I don't smoke but I offered her some apples, and she took two. As I continued on past her, she pegged both of them at me, hitting the back of my head. FML
Unreasonable
Today, I was fired from my job for not buying a pack of cigarettes for my boss. I only lasted two months in that junkyard. FML
Top comments
flirty19 0
YDI for smoking.
Lizzy86 0
haha! thats hilarious! btw, i smoke menthols too, i like the way they clear my nose.
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Comments (257)
Legz 0
Wow... This would be when the hobo earned his "get a job" card so he can go buy his own ****** cigarette. I don't smoke, but beggars can't be choosers. He's a prick.
DarthSTFU 0
That happened to me too! same bum? I dunno.
lisajean 0
I thought this post was rather entertaining. I wish hobos would say that more to me and quit stealing my cigs!
mister_moops 0
smokers are jokers! not really i couldn't care less. but that's pretty hilarious.
vibrantskies 0
I highly doubt that guy was really homeless then. If you're truly desperate for money or a cigarette, you don't give a damn.
brownies_fml 0
Don't smoke.
GodofRandom 0
Overall, I'll just say YDI for being a smoker. and with all the arguments here, I have my own points to get across that correspond with each argument. 1). 2nd hand smoke. It sucks, it's annoying, and very dangerous. And for the "just stay away from us" thing, it's not that easy to avoid. Especially in large public events. 2). Health issues. It's bad for you, why bother with it? Inhale smoke all day? Why? Can any of you really give me an honest reason as to why smoking is so great? I don't think you can. It's a bad health choice along with drinking and junk food, so what's the point? 3). The great USA's economy. Taxes go up, it's more expensive, and we all no its bad and eventually going to harm or kill you, so why keep smoking. And also, the Cancer. You might get it, you might not. You can get lung problems (or liver if you drink) and be hospitalized, put on life support, or in surgery, in which case you'll just get right back to it when you recover. Thanks a lot, assholes. It's good to know where all the taxpayers' money is going. In, conclusion, smokers suck, YDI, and if you get Cancer, it's just God's way of controling the population and ridding the world of some of the stupidity.
caitlink60 0
#200 - obviously has no idea how much of a contributer the cigarette industry is to the economy - if it wasn't then it would be banned.
random56 0
#200 - Yur an idiot...yu cannot tell people how to live their life, we are all going to die at somepoint and some people do not wish to be old and pretty much useless, keep your views on these things to yourself as it is not your decision as to what people want to do, there are enough ads and other studies out there that let people know how bad smoking is so let them make the decision... yur a jackass
megbc 0
Sure, except it doesn't only affect them. Second hand smoke is pretty disgusting.
loldude1337 0
YDI for smoking
AsAlwaysAndrew 0
Dude, Rampant period ridden smoke guy. Relax. Just because that guy in highschool that had the cigarette and you didnt cause your mommy said no. Just because you blame that guy for being a virgin til your 35 and spending 4 days on a comment. Does not make it everyone who smokes fault.
ericvolp12 0
u get what u deserve smoking asshole