ericvolp12

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Ericvolp12's favorite FMLs

Unethical

By Anonymous - 21/10/2009 02:15 - United States

Today, I decided to take a personal day from class and e-mailed all of my professors saying I had flu symptoms. While standing in line at Starbucks later, someone behind me said, "Glad you're feeling better. Hope you can attend class tomorrow, we'll discuss lying." It was my Ethics professor. FML

agreeclassic 8 870

vote type 1 59 634

By jaxattax - 20/10/2009 20:17 - United States

Today, my boyfriend gave me a fancy chocolate candy and I got angry at him for forgetting that I'm allergic to chocolate and threw the candy into the garbage disposal. Turns out, he had spent a ton of money getting a chocolatier to put an engagement ring inside the candy that I just destroyed. FML

agreeclassic 15 567

vote type 1 82 951

By Anonymous - 15/10/2009 06:19 - United States

Today, I realized that my virus protection program now has a virus. FML

agreeclassic 30 054

vote type 1 5 094

Procrastination

By Anonymous - 14/10/2009 17:01 - United States

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

agreeclassic 98 141

vote type 1 16 744

Get the message

By thelandofoz - 14/10/2009 14:36 - United States

Today, I noticed that my clothes had shrunk. My mother seemed to be having trouble with the new washer and dryer so I tried to show her exactly how they work. After my explanation she said, "I know how they work. I shrank your clothes to give you some incentive to lose all that belly you got." FML

agreeclassic 31 907

vote type 1 7 681