By Anonymous - 03/09/2012 17:16 - United States - Pensacola

Today, I went out clubbing with a few friends. A cute guy pointed at me from the bar and motioned for me to come over. I was excited and did just that. Turns out he just wanted to ask me if I'd thought about seeing a doctor for my jaundice. No, I just overdid my spray tan. FML
I agree, your life sucks 7 374
You deserved it 33 080

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Schizomaniac 24

I predict a large number of comments about Snooki. Commence.

If you used any spray tan at all, you used too much.


Schizomaniac 24

I predict a large number of comments about Snooki. Commence.

theslimshadylp 6

Lord help her baby that she brought into this world.


dang you beat meh to it!

Psych101 9

23- No one can really say for sure. All we know is that a "Snooki's" closet living relative is and Oompa Loompa. They are thought to be extremely dim-witted creatures. (Snookis, that is. Not Oompa Loomas.)

loserboii 11

Snookie want smush smush!

solosohigh 15

15- watch the south park episode about snooki. they explain it a little too well.

Snooki reminds me of a character in a movie... I think it was the lead of the movie E.T....

CallMeMcFeelii 13

30- I was thinking the same thing haha. "Oh God it's raping me! It's raping me!" Haha such a great episode.

27- haha well said

46- How dare you insult ET like that!

Jersey Shore is cancelled? Now we can go to the real Jersey shore. Well, I live in south Jersey and the shore is full of slutty girls and people who drink way too much.

Spray tans are for the weak

Or the people who don't want cancer..

hopsinlove17 26

Or oompa loompas(;

Wait, wait, wait. Slow the fuck down! Spray tans prevents cancer!? That means Snooki is a step ahead of civilization!

solosohigh 15

2- idk what is wrong with you, but your profile already says that your birthday is December 16th....

Spray tans also give that nice, tasty Doritos glow.

hopsinlove17 26

Spray tans are actually just watered down beet juice. They're perfectly safe, but you turn a reddish orange and become all streaky:(

34- oh I didn't know. My phone says the 15th...

I don't know why people get spray tans, being white is a gift. (note I'm obviously joking.)

habibiiiiiii 2

34: so what?

missamazinggg 12

34- where did that even come from?

hopsinlove17 26

34- the only thing worse than creeping...calling yourself out on it -_-

22- If I didn't want to get skin cancer, I wouldn't go in the sun as much and when I do, put on sunscreen. Which is exactly what I do. No spray tan for me! I'm staying pale and proud!

chowE_fml 4

Black people don't have to worry about any of that tanning, fake bake, skin cancer nonsense.

salamq 6

habibi ya noor el ein :)

79- Black people can still get skin cancer... they may not burn as easily, or at all, but the color of your skin doesn't prevent you from getting skin cancer, just like being pale doesn't guarantee you'll get it. But considering the fact that if you have darker skin you won't really worry about tanning, your risk would therefore decrease, so you do have a point.

84-You should talk to a real black person about these things first.

congele 6

You could get cancer either way. There are carcinogens in spray tans

Go home, 34... you're drunk.

They don't prevent cancer, only not care cancer themselves

To appease #1 Blah blah...crabs...blah blah...snooki...blah blah...civilizations collapse...

Doesn't Jaundice make you yellow and not orange?

superguppy19 3

Juandice is hep b or hep in general it will make your eyes yellow

Jaundice is actually caused by an overproduction of bilirubin. Which in turn causes the skin, and sometimes the whites of the eyes to turn yellow.

So the guy at the bar wasn't as funny as he thinks he is.

Jaundice? What's that?

I don't know why people get spray tans, they always look unnatural and odd.

I live in Florida and I have never been able to lay out with out burning pretty quickly. I have pretty tan skin and I still would burn easily most days.

5 some people go to the salon and spray tan, it actually looks nice. It depends on your skin and you have to make sure that you don't over do it.

JOcoco 14

51 - It might have something to do with skin cancer...

Laying outside with the intent to tan is not healthy. It is important to get sun, but staying out too long without sunscreen can lead to cancer. Then again, lots of things lead to cancer.

Tans in general look odd and gross......

I, for one, prefer pale skin. My fiancé is not one bit tanned and I love it ;)

Laurenlou 24

93- Not all people look bad with a tan. I personally think I look horrible with a tan. With some people who are just out in the sun a lot doing activities or work, its impossible not to become at least somewhat tan, even with sunblock on!

125, never seen a person who looked better tanned than pale. And to avoid any tanning (I am out side a lot) I always carry an umbrella.

133: All I can picture right now is a alabaster-skinned goth walking around on a sunny day with an umbrella. It's a fantastic image xD Edit: Judging from your profile I was right. You beautiful human being.

If you used any spray tan at all, you used too much.


fake doesnt always equal great.

Fake never usually equals great..


... i wonder what a fake, fake tan would be very puzzling indeed.

My theory is it all has to do with your natural skin color. I think the paler you are the more ridiculous the spray tan would look. I personally have never spray tanned but I have used tanning lotion and and since I am mixed race I am already a bit tan do the lotion in contrast with my natural color didn't come out orange, but a bit more tan.

Hey I am all for chemicals to make people people feel better about themselves it just let's us know exactly how they are on the inside: Fake.


bwahahahahha that is funny but not always true, except in the case of paris hilton.

Nice Daniel Tosh reference

31- I think a fake fake tan would be a real tan, somewhat similar to the opposite of the opposite of something.

Really, 40? (And anyone who agrees with that crap), because someone uses a fake tan to help them feel more confident, they're fake on the inside? You seem like a lovely person, don't you. Just because someone alters their physical appearance it doesn't make them a bad person for fuck sake. You're ridiculous.

101 I meant no offense and was referencing Daniel Tosh. If you looked at my profile pic you'd see the girl has a fake tan. She's one of my best friends and besides I don't judge people i'm not my mother.

Hey, maybe that's his pick up line to every hit chick with a tan!

Hot chick*

You got it right the first time, hit the chick with the tan.

"hey, did you just come the doctor? 'cause your skin is disgusting!" Now that is just clever.

That's what I was thinking. He was probably just "negging" her if he was a PUA. He just did it wrong.

The last sentence just screams YDI.

Really? I thought it stated, "I just overdid my spray tan."

At least he cared about your health ;)

Pretty_Pink_Lady 10

And at least she doesn't actually have the failing liver that jaundice suggests... Silver lining!

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