Today, I went down on the girl of my dreams. While I was down there, I started to put on a condom. As I came back up to start having sex, she told me she couldn't cheat on her boyfriend. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, while finally about to make love with my long-term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML
Today, I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, with whom I am genuinely in love. Right after I'd got the condom on, she said, "You do know this is break-up sex, right?" FML
Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered, "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML
Today, I went down on my boyfriend while he was drunk, and he told me to get protection from his bedroom. I came back, he was passed out on the couch. His parents then came into the room after hearing noises. I was sitting there naked holding a condom while he was fast asleep. FML
Today, I was having sex with a girl. After we finish, she tells me she already has a boyfriend, and that his penis is larger than mine. FML
Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML
Today, I was going down on a girl. When I looked up she was texting. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate, and I gave her a condom to put on me. She tried to open it with her teeth, but ripped it. That was my only condom. I'm now sitting here watching a soap opera with a boner. FML
Today, I finally got intimate with my girlfriend, the girl of my dreams. I undressed and, ready to step in bed with her, I see her staring at 'it'. Which was quickly followed by laughter. FML
Today, I was having sex with a girl I really like for the first time. After a while I told her I was about to come. Her response, "Lucky you." FML
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Top comments
Steffi3 40
Because obviously going down on someone doesn't count as cheating. Wait...
selfsabotage 4
Wonder how her boyfriend would feel about his girlfriends "loyalty". Sucks to be you dude but if this is the girl of your dreams I would think you know enough about her to know she had a boyfriend.
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Comments (198)
HeyTherexxx 21
She doesn't consider that cheating?
misofine 0
Jailhouse rules: eatin' ain't cheatin' See if she has a record.
damnit1989 16
Omg I laughed... Sorry OP :-).
brandoneyez1 25
But you went down on her? Is that not cheating?
Fr0gs 15
Flawed logic at its finest ?
limabeans101029 20
I voted fml because obviously it isn't your fault if you didn't know. But surely if you know enough about her to know that she's "the girl of your dreams", then you'd know that she has a boyfriend?
jmcr 27
Some times when a guy says 'girl of his dreams' doesnt always mean that they know the girl personally just that they are really attracted to their looks at first glance or found a girl that fits the guys 'type'
limabeans101029 20
That's true, but to me if someone is the "girl/guy of your dreams" it means personally as well as physically. Thinking that someone is the girl of your dreams based on appearance alone just seems kind of sad to me.
Xotoolyxo 16
How about too late? She's not worth your time, she's obviously not the faithful type
_sourskittles_7 13
she just happened to remember she had a boyfriend after you went down on her
Slimma 20
what the what? So going down is fine but as soon as you start to do other things its... hmmm... time for a new girl of your dreams.
wormsirms 8
I don't believe this happened because what kind of master Jedi can properly put on a condom while eating out downtown? Not you!!!!!