Today, I went down on the girl of my dreams. While I was down there, I started to put on a condom. As I came back up to start having sex, she told me she couldn't cheat on her boyfriend. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Quickshot
Today, while finally about to make love with my long-term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML
Today, I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, with whom I am genuinely in love. Right after I'd got the condom on, she said, "You do know this is break-up sex, right?" FML
Stud
Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered, "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML
It's sus
Today, I went down on my boyfriend while he was drunk, and he told me to get protection from his bedroom. I came back, he was passed out on the couch. His parents then came into the room after hearing noises. I was sitting there naked holding a condom while he was fast asleep. FML
Today, I was having sex with a girl. After we finish, she tells me she already has a boyfriend, and that his penis is larger than mine. FML
Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML
Boredom
Today, I was going down on a girl. When I looked up she was texting. FML
Technique
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate, and I gave her a condom to put on me. She tried to open it with her teeth, but ripped it. That was my only condom. I'm now sitting here watching a soap opera with a boner. FML
Today, I finally got intimate with my girlfriend, the girl of my dreams. I undressed and, ready to step in bed with her, I see her staring at 'it'. Which was quickly followed by laughter. FML
Comeback
Today, I was having sex with a girl I really like for the first time. After a while I told her I was about to come. Her response, "Lucky you." FML
Top comments
Steffi3 40
Because obviously going down on someone doesn't count as cheating. Wait...
selfsabotage 4
Wonder how her boyfriend would feel about his girlfriends "loyalty". Sucks to be you dude but if this is the girl of your dreams I would think you know enough about her to know she had a boyfriend.
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Comments (198)
gAt_d 26
I've always heard eatin' ain't cheatin', she obviously believes it!
happyfingers 15
My opinion on this varies. If you knew she had a boyfriend YDI. If not then FYL. Either way she's a bitch and you need a new "dream girl."
blackunicorntear 8
Why didn't you have the condom ready? Your fault you couldn't seal the deal? Obviously she got bored and grew a conscious.
Razell 13
"conscience". Also, getting bored =/= the sudden realization that one's actions are morally wrong. If she had "grown a conscious" that would mean (more or less) that she had woken up either from sleep or from a drugged state, which would put the OP in a completely different type of trouble.
richardcard82 5
Doesn't matter ate snatch
BrotherPhil 35
Oral isn't sex, according to former President Clinton. You should have got her to return the favour.
bluestar_fml 12
Seriously? If this is the girl of your dreams, you need to reconsider. Not only does this "dream girl"sound like a total bitch, but she is unfaithful. And that sucks for you. If you were aware she had a boyfriend, shame on you. However, if you didn't, that sucks. You can find someone better than that!
unlocked_ 9
But.. What?
Fat_Girl805 4
wow! choose a better girl she doesnt seem like the one :p
hellmate 12
tell her she just did
pennamay 11
Yeah..... She already did by the thought of doing this with you. Sorry OP. You deserve better.