By not_trained_for_this - 18/11/2009 06:05 - United States

Today, I was working at the school when one of the kids came crying to me about needing help with his zipper after a little "accident". Forbidden by a district ordinance to touch them in certain areas, there was nothing I could do; to which he cried and pissed his pants. Again. FML
I agree, your life sucks 37 953
You deserved it 2 932

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Then tell them to go to the Nurse, who obviously can touch students anywhere the nurse sees fit,

"Hello, Mrs Doe! This is the principal at John's school. We had to cut his pants again since he couldn't unzip them himself..." "/.../" "No, you are well aware of that we are allowed to touch the children's hips, but not the behind or front." "/.../" "Yes, we used scissors." "/.../" "No, we didn't hurt him with the scissors as we accidentally did the last time." "/.../" "If you say so, Mrs. Doe, we can let him spend the day in his peed pants, but I want that in writing from you and your husband." I really think that the fear of pedophiles has taken monstrouous proportions. Why not tdress the kids up in Burqa to protect them from peeping?

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Then tell them to go to the Nurse, who obviously can touch students anywhere the nurse sees fit,

if a kid needs to pee, it needs to pee. it doesn't have the time to walk all the way to the nurse

I love how you refer to the kid as "it".

Besides, not all schools have nurses.

Well, Robin, though not proper, it's easier to type "it" than "he/she" or "(s)he." Not trying to dehumanize, as it is a gender-neutral term, just being lazy. Anyway... OP, you should have just done it. Poor kid.

That's usually when you use singular they.

There is no such thing as a singular "they." It is grammatically incorrect. It is strictly colloquial.

my kindergarten teacher buttoned and zipped up pants all they time. oh god. pedo

my kindergarted tacher zipped and buttoned pants ALL the time to like everbody. oh god PEDO ALERT

35 yes your right but all schools are required to have some sort of health person. my schools health person is the secratary.

That's how my hold school was.

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Kid deserves it for wearing pants with zippers.

what? give em button fly pants? cause that would be kinda cool

Zippers are easier than buttons for kids.

It's the parents' fault for sending the kid to school in pants he can't take off on his own. Let him go home in the pee-soaked pants and maybe they'll learn their lesson.

It's not his fault, so he shouldn't be punished just so the parents buy him different pants. Although they should find him different pants. Anyone make elastic only pants for kids he could wear?

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Your comment really goes with your username.

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OK, so you say she should have helped him. Then what? The school is slapped with a lawsuit from the kid's parents claiming that that OP touched their child inappropriately. The OP would be fired and never allowed to teach again, and be labeled as a pedophile. The kid's family, meanwhile, would take millions of local tax dollars for themselves and live in luxury. It seems like these ordinances are partly due to overprotective parents, and partly due to the hope that, with so many rules in place, SOMEONE will mess up and the "victim" will strike it rich. Yeah, it's a stupid ordinance. OP would do better to fight it by letting the kid's parents deal with a piss-covered child than by changing his pants. Make the voters hate the ordinance, don't make them think "oh, good thing that pedophile was caught!"

And have the kid go home and say "I PEED MY PANTS AND MRS. SMITH HELPED ME WITH MY ZIPPER" "She did what?" "She touched my pee pee because I asked her to help me!"??? Can you say lawsuit?

When I first read this I thought they kid zipped IT while he was zipping his pants and then urinated while crying in pain. You guys made it a heck of a clearer.

"Hello, Mrs Doe! This is the principal at John's school. We had to cut his pants again since he couldn't unzip them himself..." "/.../" "No, you are well aware of that we are allowed to touch the children's hips, but not the behind or front." "/.../" "Yes, we used scissors." "/.../" "No, we didn't hurt him with the scissors as we accidentally did the last time." "/.../" "If you say so, Mrs. Doe, we can let him spend the day in his peed pants, but I want that in writing from you and your husband." I really think that the fear of pedophiles has taken monstrouous proportions. Why not tdress the kids up in Burqa to protect them from peeping?

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^ Promise me you'll never have kids...

really, you'd be touching a zipper nothing more than that... sometimes I think Americans go a little overboard with some of their laws.

Just a little? Come on, this is way over the top!

sadly I'm not surprised by this at all...

we really do.

Something tells me this is a kid from high school...

Don't worry, you didn't fall for that old trick. I used to do it again and again at school to get the pretty teachers to touch my dick. (That's before all those "policies" showed up. Damn policies!) They said I had to stop because it was no longer cute. . . In my junior year. . . Of college.

hahaa oh you

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