Indianagirl94
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Scott
United States
Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML
Anonymous
Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I woke up to what I thought was my 9 month old son breastfeeding. It was my boyfriend. According to him, he wanted to experience what his mother never gave him as a kid. FML
sore
France 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I woke up with bruised nipples because apparently my boyfriend likes to excessively play with them while I sleep. FML
SkeetinKeaton
United States
Baby fever
Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML
patronuscat?
Meow!
Today, I woke up in a guy's bed to one of his cats licking my nipples. FML
Milk Dispenser
Herriman, United States
Today, breastfeeding my infant has become so automatic that when my dog nuzzled up against me while I was sleeping, I lifted up my shirt and unhooked my nursing bra. FML
Alwayspotato
Bittie
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend, he had his head on my chest and we both fell asleep. Suddenly, I woke up by my boyfriend biting my nipple, hard, in his sleep. I now need to go to the pharmacy because of a bleeding nipple. FML
Nasty
Tallahassee, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, while watching home videos with my family, I saw a clip of me as an infant attempting to breast feed from my father while he laughed uncontrollably. Now, my son keeps sneaking his baby brother's head under my shirt while I'm asleep. The last time he actually began to suckle. FML
possiblyoverweight
United Kingdom
Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML
not that kinda squirting
🌶️ Spicy
Exploding milk ****
Today, my husband and I were having sex for the first time since I had our son. As I was riding him in a heated passion, he grabbed my breasts. Milk literally shot out onto his face. Mood totally ruined. FML
Top comments
SeniorHaG 4
I guess your baby is hungry.
prioo 6
He just wanted a little midnight snack without having to go all the way to the fridge.
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Comments (112)
oG100 5
I
bigvinnyT 0
Did u at least offer him a cookie to go with it
_wraith 15
A lot of people are curious about what breast milk taste like. I completely understand where you're coming from, though, OP. I'd be uncomfortable with a fully grown man trying to breast feed from me as well. xD
BriannaRWatson 13
Ummm, got milk? LOL, I'm not sure what I'd do if my husband tried that...he and I may have to have a talk now.
Cainicide 5
Well... That must've been awkward for you when you woke up.
GlobalGenocide 8
Honestly don't see a problem here, we've all(well vast majority) tasted breast milk at some time. Hell we drink milk from a cows udder almost every day. What's wrong with sampling some of our own. Now if it had been some random dude trying to latch on...
rintintin19 5
give the guy a break, it's such a long walk to the kitchen
marramrammar 2
Kewl- why go to the fridge while the pump is right next to you.
noisebox 1
Can't blame the guy for that, it could have been worse if you woke up to the back door man in action again....
Brandon2916 9
This brings a whole new meaning to "breakfast in bed"