Today, I was watching TV when a Toy Story 3 commercial came on. My Mom said, "Oh, I remember when I took you to see Toy Story. Now Andy's all grown up and so are you. The only difference is Andy is going to college and you're not." FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I saw that Pixar had put out a teaser trailer for Toy Story 3. I got so excited to watch it that had to go lay in bed for a few minutes in order to calm myself down. I'm 19 years old. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I finally watched Toy Story 3; I ended up crying when the toys almost die. After the movie, my girlfriend broke up with me because I embarrassed her. FML
Today, my manager told me to throw out some of the old toys at the daycare we work at. I can't because I've seen Toy Story 3, and thinking about them in a dump makes me cry. I'm 28. FML
Today, my daughter had a meltdown when I told her I donated some of her old toys to Goodwill. It turns out Toy Story has taught her that toys have feelings and that she has a meaningful relationship with them. She's in her teens. FML
Today, I realized the reason my 20-year-old daughter has been so moody and aggressive is because she missed the promotional My Little Pony toys at McDonald's. FML
Today, I finally bought the toy my two year-old son always wanted. He would always tap on the TV when the commercial for it would appear. I gave him the gift, and he started playing with the bag it came in. FML
Today, I went to McDonald's and ordered a Happy Meal with a girl's toy. The high school girls behind the counter said I was too old to be served one, and I had to go home and explain to my sick daughter why she didn't get her toy. FML
Today, my three year old nephew was pointing at the TV screen and saying "Uncle, Uncle!" He thought it was me on the screen. It was Rosie O'Donnell. FML
Today, I went to watch the Movie "UP." At one point in the movie I got really sad and started to cry a bit. The 7 year old girl next to me noticed and told me to shut and man up. FML
Today, I told my mom a funny story, and she responded with, “Yeah, I saw it on your Instagram last week.” My life is now reduced to reruns. FML
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Top comments
wasup21 0
should have studied in school
Quest_ 13
It's not your fault that your ma masturbates to the idea of having a kid that goes to college. You are you! Sometimes I wish I wasn't going to uni and had opted to learn a nice trade instead. Or married a very old hotel tycoon.
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Comments (209)
Hellie_fml 0
Tsktsk. School's important you know. YDI.
NezzyLove 0
ZING! You just got burned by your mother. :D If that comment bothers you so much, do something about it.
IchiDork 4
You know what? This is hardly FML worthy. YDI for making the page when you shouldn't have. Get out of my face with this crap.
Moonstarmist 0
I can't exactly say YDI without knowing why you aren't going. For all we know, OP can't afford college and decided to take a year/semester off so he can pay for it and possibly other bills that need paying. It's not so bad, though. Not going to college doesn't mean you're stupid.
dblogic 19
This is like one of the only voices/comments of reason & compassion in this sea of pettiness. The only losers here are those so quick to condemn & shame the OP. I guess all these posters missed the day they taught decency at college? You would think one would want a little backstory to see if higher education was missed by choice or by circumstance before you say hurtful things. His mom could be just a raging mean bitch & then y'all are just piling on. In any event that is a ****** up thing to say to your kid, slacker or not. Sorry OP.
meagy 6
story of my life -.-
sixtrey 0
here some idea's for all you college geeks saying someone is stupid for not going to college how about you dont go to college or you start your own buisiness and make more then 75% of all people that went to college? Or become a mechanic or something in a factory, you'll also make more then college geeks
choupinette77 0
goodluck with that fail business you are going to start with no skills/ knowledge in entrepreneurship.
zach55 0
it's funny because Andy is going to college and your not
IchiDork 4
First comment and I get moderated. Alright!
compliments 0
penis
m_xxx 0
That's not bad!