Today, I was talking to my co-workers about how I've sadly been an orphan since an early age. One of them exclaimed, "Hey, just like Batman!" FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, two guys proclaiming that they were both Batman attacked me on the street. FML
Today, I decided to be productive and work from a coffee shop. Just as I was about to talk to my boss on a video conference call, the barista shouted, "Latte for Batman!" FML
Today, my department found out that we're getting a new supervisor for the third time this month. I joked about how we're like "the foster kid nobody wants." One of my coworkers burst into tears and ran off. I later found out that she had been a foster child and never once had a stable home. FML
Today, at work, I casually mentioned I was meeting some friends for dinner. My co-worker's response was, "You have friends?!" FML
Today, while talking with a coworker, we discussed a weekend home invasion scenario. It was then that I realized my social circle is so non-existent, that my job would notice I'm gone before my friends would. FML
Today, I was talking to my good friend's girlfriend. She mentioned being afraid of losing her job. Because she was still a teenager, I jokingly said, "Oh, like you're responsible for a whole family!" She is. FML
Today, my boss told me he is a superhero. He has written countless comics about his crusades and adventures. I make fifty dollars an hour less than him. FML
Today, my mom, who is a huge Batman fan, is still weepy and talking non-stop about Kevin Conroy, as she has been for the past two weeks. After three days it was starting to get excessive; now I think I'm going mad like the Joker. FML
Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML
Today, I realised that I'm kinda living the life of a Disney princess, because I'm lonely and all my friends are animals. Yes, I also talk to them. FML
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Top comments
fistnazal 10
Why so serious? Let's put'ah SMILE on that face ; )
Dweron93 5
He knows, he must be the joker :O
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Comments (182)
Hannah_grace1414 12
Seems like a pretty legit answer, batman is legit
PrincessPesa 20
Your mom is legit.
murdersquirrel 15
Did you just hear someone say 'legit' for the first time? Do you know what it means or do you think it just means that something is cool?
doubleea 3
Batman is legit though. In the full meaning of the word.
deviable 9
Le git is French for "the git".
Ruffclue 9
Say this really loudly - "this is SPARTAA " and than kick him really hard.
doubleea 3
I don't think that's Batman's line.
Ruffclue 9
I kno. Everyone is up on batmans **** on this fml. I just wanted to say something random. And Op is an orphan thats not something to make fun of.
doubleea 3
Saying someone is Batman is a compliment, not an insult.
mylife47 0
It is you just don't know it yet.
Redoxx_fml 22
Where were the other drugs going?!
kickuwithmyfist 1
NANA NANA NANA NANA!...BAT-MAN!
Ruffclue 9
Lol
badbadkitty 5
I say they have a good point. Wallow in your orphaned state, or be badass like Batman..... Just sayin'.
challan 19
Bruce, we've all known for years that you are Batman. I know you think it's a big mystery, and that if you keep all your secret gadgets in the batcave the public won't find out, but we know! We've just been protecting your feelings all these years. C'mon who else could afford the batmobile? We live in Gotham, and it's the freaking ghetto man.
chief1988 0
Haa nicee
Spicynipples 0
We got a bad ass over here
Pandacupcakelove 26
Doesn't really work on this one...
Llamacod 11
Wow, you're a billionaire orphan, that is just like batman
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
Dude, are you crazy?! I don't ever say this, but I believe this is the only time it'll ever apply: Take it as a compliment! Nothing else will make you feel as great about being orphaned. Take that co-worker out for some ribs, and stuff your faces over the schematics for your shiny new Batcave. Make him your Alfred, pull on your black leotard, and go fight crime like a boss.
mugu 0
Lol!! I agree, he should do that, specially the "put on a black leotard" part!! Lmao :D
jaredofmo 22
Batman is awesome.
mugu 0
Actually, Robin will have more variety to choose from now!! ;) haha