Today, I was talking to my co-workers about how I've sadly been an orphan since an early age. One of them exclaimed, "Hey, just like Batman!" FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, two guys proclaiming that they were both Batman attacked me on the street. FML
Today, I decided to be productive and work from a coffee shop. Just as I was about to talk to my boss on a video conference call, the barista shouted, "Latte for Batman!" FML
Today, my department found out that we're getting a new supervisor for the third time this month. I joked about how we're like "the foster kid nobody wants." One of my coworkers burst into tears and ran off. I later found out that she had been a foster child and never once had a stable home. FML
Today, at work, I casually mentioned I was meeting some friends for dinner. My co-worker's response was, "You have friends?!" FML
Today, while talking with a coworker, we discussed a weekend home invasion scenario. It was then that I realized my social circle is so non-existent, that my job would notice I'm gone before my friends would. FML
Today, I was talking to my good friend's girlfriend. She mentioned being afraid of losing her job. Because she was still a teenager, I jokingly said, "Oh, like you're responsible for a whole family!" She is. FML
Today, my boss told me he is a superhero. He has written countless comics about his crusades and adventures. I make fifty dollars an hour less than him. FML
Today, my mom, who is a huge Batman fan, is still weepy and talking non-stop about Kevin Conroy, as she has been for the past two weeks. After three days it was starting to get excessive; now I think I'm going mad like the Joker. FML
Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML
Today, I realised that I'm kinda living the life of a Disney princess, because I'm lonely and all my friends are animals. Yes, I also talk to them. FML
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Top comments
fistnazal 10
Why so serious? Let's put'ah SMILE on that face ; )
Dweron93 5
He knows, he must be the joker :O
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Comments (182)
mosquito19 14
why would you tell that to a group of co-workers?
NYCBOII123 7
Batman, that's funny *knocks coworker out*
lfrye 6
Holy Safari batman
Redoxx_fml 22
Swear to me!
crywf312 4
op: "no!... like the dark knight" (dramatic music begins)... then you jump out the first window you find.
Weezay 5
Herp
iTrumpet 7
Dude, you got compared to Batman! Embrace it!
LoganBurrito 6
From now on, any time you see the person, show them how right they are by sneaking behind them and screaming "I'M BATMAN" in a deep, throaty voice.
annigotammo 1
I really do not see the problem here. Batman is. Awesome.
night_saint 5
Batman is cool.