Today, I was taking the subway to school. It was around 6:30am and I was listening to music and catching up on homework. When I took my headphones off to readjust them, I heard some grunting. I looked over at the man across from me to see he was masturbating. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I was taking a dump in a public restroom. Minding my own business, I heard somebody go into an adjacent stall. It was dead silent and I don't think he knew I was in there. I thought I heard him scratching his arm or something. I was wrong. He was jacking off. I had to listen to it all. FML
Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML
Today, I was getting dirty looks on the train whilst air strumming the guitar to a song on my iPod, after glancing at the reflection in the window I realized it looked like I was masturbating. FML
Today, I surprisingly found two empty seats on the subway. Before anyone could get to them, I rushed and triumphantly sat down, enjoying my victory, until I noticed why they were empty. I had just sat down next to a guy vigorously trying to fellate himself. FML
Today, I was riding the subway to work. Barely anyone was on because of how early it was. Me and this one guy in a trench coat were in the same cart. His stop came. He walked by me, flashed me, rubbed his penis on my arm, and then ran away really fast. FML
Today, I listened to my roommate having sex from 3 a.m. until 6 a.m. When I looked over at my girlfriend, who must have thought I was sleeping, I noticed she was masturbating. FML
Today, I was quietly reading in the subway, when all of a sudden, at a station, the man sitting next to me stood up, slapped me, yelled "Bitch!", and rushed off the train. FML
Today, a pervert was visibly playing with himself right next to me on the train. Then on the bus. Then on the other bus I changed to in order to lose him. At least somebody's interested. FML
Today, I was walking to school with my earphones in, when someone tapped me on the shoulder. I was shocked, and whirled around to hit him in the crotch. I soon realized he was just trying to return the commuter pass I'd dropped at the station. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my neighbor pleasuring himself. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Gringo_fml 0
Not over you i hope =//
ellykhoshkele 0
ewwwwwwwwww u poor soul!!!! yuck!!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (97)
Kitten125 0
.... um... maybe he thought you were a sexy beast. It's a kinda a compliment... kinda.
greenman_fml 0
did he dot your eyes?
lamarr 0
and you walked away with a pretty pearl necklace
715141 0
why the **** do people do that on the subway? or anywhere public for that matter.
tokyooo123 0
lol SKETCH
voicegoesboom 0
sickkkkk
dizzygirl06 0
welcome to the paris metro as well. some people are so strange..
thequeenofscots 0
That's the problem with the subway... I've seen that happen so much but it still grosses me out every time.
lol135 0
Something very similar happened to me at the subway station. I was talking to my friend and this guy behind her had a huge smile on his face, I naturally thought he was just happy but then my friend tilted a bit and to my surprise his pants were to the ground and he was stroking himself. in front of over 100 people, including little kids.
DrewKolar 0
I feel like everyone has some sort of masturbating or sex on the subway story. :) (Either they've done it or have witnessed it, that is.) It happens...