Today, I was taking the subway to school. It was around 6:30am and I was listening to music and catching up on homework. When I took my headphones off to readjust them, I heard some grunting. I looked over at the man across from me to see he was masturbating. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was taking a dump in a public restroom. Minding my own business, I heard somebody go into an adjacent stall. It was dead silent and I don't think he knew I was in there. I thought I heard him scratching his arm or something. I was wrong. He was jacking off. I had to listen to it all. FML
Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML
Today, I was getting dirty looks on the train whilst air strumming the guitar to a song on my iPod, after glancing at the reflection in the window I realized it looked like I was masturbating. FML
Today, I surprisingly found two empty seats on the subway. Before anyone could get to them, I rushed and triumphantly sat down, enjoying my victory, until I noticed why they were empty. I had just sat down next to a guy vigorously trying to fellate himself. FML
Today, I was riding the subway to work. Barely anyone was on because of how early it was. Me and this one guy in a trench coat were in the same cart. His stop came. He walked by me, flashed me, rubbed his penis on my arm, and then ran away really fast. FML
Today, I listened to my roommate having sex from 3 a.m. until 6 a.m. When I looked over at my girlfriend, who must have thought I was sleeping, I noticed she was masturbating. FML
Today, I was quietly reading in the subway, when all of a sudden, at a station, the man sitting next to me stood up, slapped me, yelled "Bitch!", and rushed off the train. FML
Today, a pervert was visibly playing with himself right next to me on the train. Then on the bus. Then on the other bus I changed to in order to lose him. At least somebody's interested. FML
Today, I was walking to school with my earphones in, when someone tapped me on the shoulder. I was shocked, and whirled around to hit him in the crotch. I soon realized he was just trying to return the commuter pass I'd dropped at the station. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my neighbor pleasuring himself. FML
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Top comments
Gringo_fml 0
Not over you i hope =//
ellykhoshkele 0
ewwwwwwwwww u poor soul!!!! yuck!!
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Comments (97)
Guyoverhere 0
Who the hell masturbates infront of strangers in public
melicakes 0
How can anybody say you deserve this? That doesnt even make sense.
LordNate 0
I can't stop laughing XD
MasterConan 0
guess ur hot then huh? lmao.
rOBboCOp 0
how doya jerk off on a subway like i mean theres lots of distractions and if it was me i wouldnt have been able to focus :)
1NYCHottie 0
It was a mentally challenged person for sure...
qwertification 0
sorry i didnt see you on the subway
1NYCHottie 0
Damn, it just had to be in NYC!!? And this happens often, so I know this Fml is true! That sux Op!!
annabanana601 0
lol but that's not really an fml.
tdwp964 0
Hahaha not at the subway carlos!
lizzyboo1021 0
Lmaoooo how he gunna do dat on a subway