Today, I was swimming in the fast lane at the pool. A guy in blue trunks was swimming slowly and really getting on everyone's nerves. I took a break, and looking around I couldn't see him. I turned to the guy next to me and said, "Finally, Mr. Blue Trunks has f**ked off." It was Mr. Blue Trunks. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was swimming my routine laps at the gym's pool and a man came in and swam in the adjacent lane. While swimming freestyle, I smelled a really nasty fart. Not a minute later, he hurriedly left. I didn't realize what he had done until I saw "floating particles" in the water. FML
Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML
Today, I went to the pool with my new white bathers. I felt really good about myself because everyone was staring at me until this hot guy came up to me and said "Dude, your bathers are see-through. You need to shave!" FML
Today, at the public pool, my boyfriend dived from one side to the other. I jumped in to reward him underwater, kissing him everywhere and grabbing his crotch, until I noticed his shorts were different. I surfaced to see that my boyfriend was still far away. FML
Today, I was at a swim meet, swimming as hard as I'd ever swum before. During the last lap I saw no one in the lanes next to me. Thinking I was first, I became extremely excited. When I came to the wall, I realized the reason no one else was around: They already finished the race. I was last. FML
Today, a few of my friends arranged for us to go skinny-dipping with the guy I really like. It went really well, until a turd surfaced before our eyes. After we scrambled out of the pool in panic, my crush called us all freaks and left. FML
Today, at the pool, I tried to impress the hot lifeguard by doing the perfect dive. Afterward, I realized my shorts were floating through the water. FML
Today, I was in swimming practice at the pool. I suddenly got breathless, dizzy, and felt like I was drowning. I cried out to the instructor, telling him I had a weak heart. He shouted back, "I don't care about your love life! Swim, bitch!" FML
Today, I was at a friend's pool party. He lives on a lake and one of our friends wouldn't get in the water. My best friend and I decided to push him off the dock. Once we had, I turned to see my crush who had watched looked shocked, then said, "You know he can't swim right?" FML
Today, I went swimming. While I was walking along side of the pool, everyone was staring at me. I began to think that my diet was really working. It was only an hour later, in the changing rooms, that I noticed the string from my Tampax that was sticking out of my swimming costume. FML
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Top comments
noobgang7 5
wow keep ur mouth shut next time
Residence_fml 4
You feel bad about him finding out everyone thought he was annoying? Shouldn't you have told him that he was too slow so he could get out and go swim into another lane? YDI for bitching about someone the entire time without doing something about it and then feel bad he found out.
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Comments (139)
Resquall 0
@110 Reading your comment hurt my eyes.
whataloadofbull 0
Snicker: you do realize that YOU don't know the OP personally, and therefore, your argument is very hypocritical? Despite the fact that the OP may have been rude about Blue Trunks' inability to swim very well, this sort of situation has happened to a lot of people. Your reply to this FML could have ended well with a "Oh, he was childish and immature for saying stuff like that in public" but you must have been really bitter that day and went too far with the "DUHH" and the "asshole." Keep that kinda stuff to yourself.
dumbhaters 0
snickerdoodles is a greasy ranga with nothing better to do but complain about spelling and tell people what to do. stop posting
eniiwa 0
^ this. and WTF are u doing out of the kitchen snickerdoodles? gtfoff the comp and back to where you belong!!
TKDWill 13
I understand that people do annoying shit all the time but if you don't have the balls or ovaries (or both nowadays for some) for someone to hear what you are thinking then you need to practice on not speaking your thoughts out loud. You are just lucky your FML didn't end in you adding in the fantastic ass beating he could of gave you.
DeservedIt 0
YDI for being one of those pretentious D bags who won't let people enjoy a swimming pool. People like you need half the pool for themselves so they can do dumb stuff like practice for the Olympics (and in the end they don't even earn a medal). If you want to do sports, train in your bathtub. In the meantime, let kids enjoy the swimming pool and have fun. I hope you drown in your personal pool lane and nobody finds it until 3 months because you didn't let them go near that part of the pool.
Ecnash 0
dumb stuff like train for the olympics? most people dream of just going to the olympics. now you are being one of those pretentious D bags who won't let people achieve their dream. and no i'm not agreeing with OP, i'm merely knocking you off your high horse.
Flutist 3
Um, if you don't like people taking over the pool then build your own damn pool. There a pools that people use for swimming laps and to keep in shape. Kids can go swim at another pool. I don't think kids should be allowed in certain pools. They make messes and sure don't respect people. What makes you better than the people who want to train for the Olympics? Why can't you just take your kid to a public pool or teach them to stay in one area.
StoryOfTheYear 15
@ 113 that means that you probably need to stop staring at the computer screen, it does that
Zills 0
@110 I have seen a real woman, I'm not gay and it's not always about tit size you ignorant ****. Snicker is beautiful. And you're probably a fat greasy ************ that sits in front of your computer all day wanking off to gay ****. Stop deflecting yourself on others you're the ******.
chwder912 3
just say **** you retard
Zills 0
I have seen a real woman, I'm not gay and it's not always about tit size you ignorant ****. Snicker is beautiful. And you're probably a fat greasy ************ that sits in front of your computer all day wanking off to gay ****. Stop deflecting yourself on others you're the ******.