Today, I was riding a new horse when a lawnmower starting up spooked her. She jumped straight up in the air and I landed directly on the saddle horn. I can't walk or feel anything between my legs. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was riding my newly trained horse. I've recently been suffering from bad gas, and ended up farting so violently, it spooked my horse into bucking me off and running away. FML
Today, I was putting my horse away into her pasture, when I slipped in the mud. In a haisty attempt to support myself, I grabbed the electric fence in on hand, and my horse with the other. The shock from the fence traveled through me to her, sending her running and leaving me with 2 broken teeth. FML
Today, my horse farted and scared itself, then ran all the way up the hill and wouldn't stop until I fell off. FML
Today, my horse, who has been nothing but gentle for 27 years, kicked me right in the knee on my last vacation day. It's so bad, I can hardly sleep or sit down on the toilet. Tomorrow I go back to work, which involves lots of walking, sitting down and getting back up, as well as lifting heavy stuff. FML
Today, while riding a massive draft horse, the horse thought it would be fun to walk under a very low apple tree that sat level with his back. A branch hit me and made me fall off onto a coil of barbed wire, twisting my ankle in the process. FML
Today, my horse learned a new acrobatic trick. Unfortunately, I was still on top of him when he tried to somersault. The horse is fine. I'm in the hospital, fresh out of surgery for a broken femur. FML
Today, I was horseback riding. Somebody yelled something behind me, so I turned around. Next thing I know, I am on the ground and my head is killing me. It turns out I ran into a tree branch. The person behind me simply said, "Watch out!" FML
Today, my idiot horse decided to grab a mouthful of stinging nettles while I was riding him. He panicked at the burning sensation in his mouth and bucked me off. Don't worry, though, my fall was cushioned, by the nettles. FML
Today, my parents came to visit me at the ranch I work at. They're scared to death of horses, but I was explaining how they are almost completely harmless. I was showing them how to work around the horse without getting kicked. As they relaxed, the horse kicked me. I now have a broken leg. FML
Today, I broke my wrist when I got into a disagreement with a horse. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
Gack! We don't know the OP's gender, so it's hard to make a fitting comment. This is why we stick to cars.
stormchaser24 24
Ouch, FYL. Hope you feel better soon.
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Comments (149)
mildredpierce 12
Ouch! That's taking saddle sore to a whole new level.
ChazzyWazzy1998 10
Rich people problems-_- Just joking, that sounds painful. FYL xx
86ed 4
Should have used an English saddle.
grrrrrrrreat 8
I really hope you're a girl.
iwadasn 33
It would hurt either way.
icepick23 12
May the force be with you.
megnog 11
I'm curious as to whether you're a boy or a girl, OP.
NagainaFier 16
That's the beauty of english saddles; no horns. That, or sidesaddles. But all seriousness OP, hope you and your dangly bits feel better soon D:
YouMissedASpot 8
Ouch!!!! Iv almost had that happened but escaped in tack. All my horses bad spooks have landed me on my butt in the dirt if they un seat me. Not because I'm awesome, just because my horse rarely has huge spooks lol
hmholmack 10
And all I want to know is whether you are a man or woman!
hbeeter 10
Please. Please. Please. Please. Not be a man otherwise that must kill. (Manhood gone)