Today, I was paintballing when I got shot in the stomach and winded. As I was gasping for breath on the ground, someone came up and shot me point blank in my crotch. FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, while playing paintball, a shot ricocheted off a wall and slammed into my nuts. I told the other team I was out and tried to run out of the field, but as I was jogging to the door I was hit again in the balls. My friend saw this and dropped his gun, laughing. It hit me too. FML
Today, I went paintballing with my girlfriend and her family. Her dad ended up shooting me, and I doubled over in pain. I thought that was it, until he stepped back and shot me several more times in the stomach. "Just double-tapping," he smirked. More like quadruple-tapping. FML
Today, I went paintballing with my siblings. Once we were done, they realised I hadn't been shot at all. They cornered me in the forest and lit me up. I have welts all over my legs. FML
Today, I thought it would be fun to join my friends for a game of paintball. I got shot in the same spot three times in a row. It turned out to be my own team, who mistook me for the enemy because I was wearing… camouflage. FML
Today, I played paintball with a bunch of friends. By the end of the day, my girlfriend and I were the only people left on the field. She shot me mercilessly, and I screamed like a little girl. 30 people watched, 4 people filmed. FML
Today, me and my girlfriend went paintballing. I made sure we were on the same team, so I could protect her and be manly. The first time she got shot was by me, I shot her finger. It broke. FML
Today, I played an intense paintball match, with me and my friends versus my boyfriend and his buddies. When we won, my boyfriend went mental and said he only lost because of "lag". When I pointed out we weren't in a video game, he reacted by firing a paintball straight into my chest. FML
Today, I went paint-balling with my girlfriend. As we drove she was scared about getting shot a lot, especially in the head. I reassured her that with all the protective gear it was unlikely. First round, within a minute, she gets shot 3 times in the back of the head. FML
Today, at a paintball match, my boyfriend shot me between the legs and asked, "Still want kids now?" FML
Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML
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Top comments
TenebrificTurtle 0
Okay, your life sounds more interesting than mine. Someone got your breathless, you swooned to the ground, and someone took a shot on your genitals--sounds like a romance novel.
fireandice27 0
Now that's just mean!
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Comments (146)
gravityplanx 0
unless you tweaked the guns to fire super soft, this is fake... A point-blank paintball shot can break skin. Being shot in the balls, point-blank, would do far more than cause pain. You would need immediate medical attention. Or maybe the OP really did have a cut open, bleeding ballsack with testicles the size of watermelons... but if they had, i feel like it would have been mentioned (surefire way to get more sympathy is to tell people your ballsack got ripped open).
Dcvictorious 0
that or unwanted attention over your ballbag...
Leon_S_Kennedy 0
doesn't have to be point blank to break the skin. I have a scar on my back that I got when my friend was about 10 ft. away.
acidblasta 0
umm... paintball guns are required to shoot under 300 feet per second thats a requirement by the insurance companies that cover the paintball fields and they don't shoot super soft they still leave a good sting but never cause serious injury.
AdviceDog 0
DIP IT IN METAL . ._ ,:' ./ . __....._ / ./ . / . ,-.._.' | . / 6 . ___ .| 6 . . . . . . .4 .| . . . .. . . ./ ._ .. .---- ' .(_'---'`) ./ `'---`() BECOME IMMORTAL
littlegolferboy 4
More like FailDog, amirite?
benisajosher 0
Fake.
FarSide 23
Coup de Grâce. lol.
perdix 31
So what color are your balls now? If they got you with blue paint, I'm going to howl with laughter.
FarSide 23
freaking hilarious.
Apachefire21 0
retard. why would you fall anyway. you little girl
8trickster8 0
How could a shot to the chest wind someone? I mean it would hurt, but you'd be able to breathe easily.
Dcvictorious 0
it says stomach- if they hit you just below the ribs on the diaphragm then it's easy to get winded.
cerebellum_fml 0
pussy
PlasmaWafflez 0
YDI for paintballing
Mx_Rider 6
haha i doubt this happened but i dont wanna pull the "FAKE" card or some idiot will comment me back with like a essay type comment just to tell me the circumstances that could make this shit happen. on a different note op u suck at paintball ydi for not playing better rofl fyl son
whataloadofbull 0
you just implied you put the "fake" card over you idiot. next time be more subtle or just stfu