By Z - 26/11/2012 10:26 - Australia

Today, I played paintball with a bunch of friends. By the end of the day, my girlfriend and I were the only people left on the field. She shot me mercilessly, and I screamed like a little girl. 30 people watched, 4 people filmed. FML
I agree, your life sucks 12 751
You deserved it 24 936

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Well paintballs hurt like a bitch so if she kept shooting you I don't blame you.

You just stood there? we have legs for a reason.

Comments

Well that sucks...

That's why it's on fml...

Well paintballs hurt like a bitch so if she kept shooting you I don't blame you.

Wonder how far away she was shooting from...point blank would be no bueno. Regardless, FYL, op.

Exactly! I don't understand why so many people are saying YDI.

People clicking "YDI" clearly have never been mercilessly assaulted by a barrage of paintballs. For some reason, when it happens, your brain neglects to tell your legs to run, and all you can do is helplessly crouch and throw your hands defensively in front of your face while you scream, "STAAAAAAAAAHP!!!!!"

Facemask (obviously) neckguard, 2 layers of long sleeve t's or a hoody, gloves and ear protectors. Wear those and you will never cry like a bitch again.

47- This is true. The very first time I played, I wasn't wearing enough protection, and REALLY regretted it. When I played a few years later with my guy friends, I had on all the protective gear, and felt fearless. Needless to say, the 2nd time around I was much more successful.

They really only hurt if it's your first time playing (which I suspect may be the case for OP). I typically have a lowish pain tolerance, but whenever I play, I usually am just wearing the mask, a t-shirt, and my paintball pants (which are a bit thicker for sliding purposes). I've been bunkered/shot point blank on the top of the head/my sides/chest/etc. and it doesn't really hurt that bad. But I've been at it for a few years, so my whole story might very well be invalid in this case.

47 - I once made the mistake of "killing" two instructors playing OpFor (bad guys) during a paintball training exercise. The remaining three unleashed fully automatic paint hell upon me. I can safely say, even in military grade body armor and a Kevlar helmet, it still fucking hurts. FYL.

After playing for so long, I stopped caring about it. Being shot so many times for so many years, you gain leather skin.

FML? That's kinda cute....

You just stood there? we have legs for a reason.

Running away doesn't seem any manlier, though. Best to just take it like a man and have her take care of your wounds when you get home. ;)

Read number 39's comment in the above thread. She explains it well. :)

Running away helps, it also helps to shoot back. And if it she shot at a defenseless you, you can still shoot back after she runs out of ammo. All's fair in love and paintball war.

Is it weird that reading this FML sort of turned me on?

Yes, it is weird.

So what. He was frozen in place

Dude don't just stand there

He was getting hit non stop. So he has his reason

No he doesn't! That's a reason to run like hell!

Being hit with paintballs point-blank like that hurts like a bitch. I don't blame you for screaming - I would've too.

Definitely, people are forgetting it leaves welts on your skin thru direct contact. >_< Got shot by one on the arm one night because some douches didn't want me to interlock arms with my boyfriend.

63- with regards to the welts, I met this one guy who was big into tourny paintball, and his left side of his chest was all scarred from being shot. Often times it can break the skin at close range.

Never underestimate a girl's skills! I played paintball once with a group of guy friends, and their outcome was similar to yours. That whole "oh my gosh, I don't know what I'm doing, tee-hee" is simply an act we put on... makes you boys easier prey. :)

Yep... Makes boys even easier as a prey when you act like you don't know what your doing when in reality the next moment you got all of the guys down!

It also helps us do things we don't like/want doing-fix the garbage disposal, change the oil in our car, parallel parking, etc.

Guys pull the same shit, but with cooking and laundry.

I use to play in tournaments. I was the only girl on the team. Often they'd pick off my team mates thinking I would be an easy out. We won quite a few rounds that way.

#36 you forgot doing dishes. I freaking hate washing dishes. Ill make any excuse not to do them.

It blows my mind that people can't parallel park! I made my boyfriend try it and he ended up with his front wheel over the curb. Needless to say, I'm the desginated parallel parker in our relationship.

You are sadistic...and I love it! >:-)

68- I don't know if I should be flattered or creeped out by that comment. o.O

When in doubt run... Something OP didn't do...

Hey guys don't want to shoot there girls so he was just being nice and just so you know most guys dot by that I don't know why I'm doing stuff

Bs. My husband shot me plenty. Ever get hit in the nipple with a flat line barrel? Talk about pain. As far as paintball, never run and never surrender. Be ready to unload on whoever comes near you.

She had to show everybody who was the dominant one in your relationship.

Minus the paint balls that is

32- coming from the one in the bra...

60- What does her profile picture have to do with OP not having balls?

What an awesome girlfriend. Really. No sarcasm. I mean it , that's awesome.

10- Agreed! My guy friends love girls who can hold their own in games like Paintball (once they get over getting their asses kicked, that is).

Did you flail your arms like one too?