Today, I was looking in the refrigerator for something to drink. I found a jug of lemonade with a piece of paper on it saying "Mom's Lemonade, Don't Drink!" I was really thirsty, so I ignored it and drank the whole jug. My mom is about to have a colonoscopy and had filled it with laxatives. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my mom was acting really pissy, and I couldn't help but mutter that she must be on her period. Five hours later, I'm glued to the toilet with my phone, because she went all out for revenge and spiked my dinner with some hellishly potent kind of laxative. FML
Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. Then I found another note on a can that said, "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML
Today, I poured out a glass of apple juice to drink. I threw out a beer can from earlier, and my mom thought I was drinking alcohol, not juice. She scolded me, until I made her physically taste the juice. FML
Today, in preparation for a presentation at work, I decided to take a handful of vitamins to fight my cold. As I was putting the bottles away, I noticed one of them was a laxative. FML
Today, my daughter ran up to me and gave me a cup. She said it was lemonade that she made with her friend. When I took a sip, she giggled and ran back to her room. It was not lemonade. FML
Today, I helped myself to a small glass of cocktail from the fridge, not realising it was alcoholic. I told my mom what happened. She made me drink salty water until I vomited so I wouldn't get "alcohol poisoning". I'm 19. FML
Today, I was at home, my mom came and saw me holding what she thought was a glass of beer. She took the glass, threw it and slapped me for drinking it. I was drinking Apple Juice. FML
Today, I was babysitting a 9-year-old kid, when she got thirsty and asked for a drink. All I could find was some kind of Mexican fruit drink, but I didn't realize until too late that it was actually hard liquor. I had to scrub her mouth out with toothpaste and put her to bed to cover it all up. FML
Today, after months of incredibly painful stomach cramps, I convinced my mom that I needed to see a doctor. Not even 2 minutes into the exam, the doctor tells me that I'm heavily constipated and advised some "prune juice" to help "clear all that shit out". My mom won't stop laughing at me. FML
Today, my mother had to take a stool sample because she has been ill for several days. Curious, I eventually had to ask, "How did you intercept the poo before it got submerged in water?" She yelled from the other room, "You know that little plate with the red stripe?" I was eating off it. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
rickster470 0
YDI you dumb shit.
kelsey_drives 0
lol, idiot.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (172)
Swimmergrl9244 1
Next time just get some ******* water. YDI for being an idiot.
solocredere12 4
Part of me thinks YDI for drinking something that says "Don't Drink". But that stuff tastes like shit, how the hell did you not notice that!? Unless you like the taste of laxatives??
1965 0
Yeah, there's medicine in that jug mixed with the "lemonade." How did you not taste that??
crazyride 0
As I stated below, they have changed the process so much. I just had a colonoscopy about a month ago and it's literally a powder you mix and you do not taste much of a difference if any at all.
BikerMike 0
Well SHIT this is funny
xoQuyenn 0
YDI dumbass. that's what you get for not listening to signs that are probably important.
MandyPandy 4
YDI, 1. Pay attention to signs like that 2. It's called water you dumbass, don't you have a faucet?
kmgentil 0
how do u drink the whole thing, its better than pee
benflick 0
Water isn't free, ever heard of Water Works dumbshit?
Morokea 0
This gives me a great idea for how to get back at my food-stealing brother...
freddie_fml 0
Have fun ******** your brains out all night long.
magneticcheese 0
LMFAO wow you totally deserved it for not putting the jug back down when it clearly said NOT TO DRINK IT. was there nothing else? WATER, perhaps? LOL boy is your butthole ever going to hurt! let us know if you live :D