Today, I was leaving school to get tested for peptic ulcers, because my stomach has been hurting for a few months. To wish me luck, one of my friends gave me a friendly punch in the stomach. I threw up blood. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Make it stop!
Today, I got diagnosed with stomach ulcers. They are very painful, and I have been throwing up blood. On my latest trip to the toilet, I was heaving and the pain was making me beat the floor with my fist, the toilet lid decided to come crashing down on my head, giving me a minor concussion. FML
Today, I had a stomach virus. I tried to make myself throw up to feel better. My long nails sliced open my throat from the inside, and I threw up blood. FML
Today, I woke up feeling ill. My mom sent me to school anyway, and grounded me for "lying" about being sick. As soon as I got to school, I began vomiting blood. FML
Worst prank ever
Today, I was in school when I got up to ask the teacher a question. For no reason, the guy sitting next to me punched me in the gut so hard I collapsed and saw stars. The teacher simply rolled her eyes and told me to get back to work. FML
Welcome to the Splash Zone!
Today, we had a test in history. My best friend, who was sitting right behind me, had forgotten about it and put his finger in his throat to vomit. It sprayed all over his desk, his pants, and the entirety of my back. FML
E.R.
Today, I drove a friend to the emergency room because he thought he had appendicitis. While sitting in the waiting room, I got puked on by a child. My friend's diagnosis? Gas. So he also farted all the way home. FML
Tis the season to be jolly
Today, at the ripe age of 20, I spent the early hours of my morning violently vomiting blood every time I got too warm. I then had the pleasure of shitting in a plastic container for a stool sample, due to said problem, after one and half hours of sleep. FML
Today, I was planning to ask a guy at school out since I had mustered up the confidence to finally tell him how I really felt. I ended up puking on him. FML
Clusterfuck
Today, I went to the doctor's office to get my yearly check up. Soon after I got home, I threw up and somehow had a fever. FML
Today, I found out that I puke and then pass out at the sight of blood. I am a 16 year old girl expecting hundreds of periods to come. FML
Top comments
Twisted107 4
looks like you did have one.
bigphill1333 0
What a dick.
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Comments (112)
rlerke 0
he saved you money on your test
beastin34 0
damn my best friend has it and he coughs blood when it flares up
cjspringsteen 0
Awww that"s really mean!
5up3rTAN 0
Stop complaining !!
TardxxxCake 4
28: You're a ******* dumb bitch. how the hell would you like it if you were throwing up blood? idiot.
Heliol 8
28's probably just a masochist and is jealous that this guy has this great pain and is bitching about it instead of getting turned on.
jbtheone_fml 5
TerdXXXfruitcake Such anger, I'm glad there are people like you, it sure makes my life seem that much better, F'n LOOOSER!!
mintcar 10
Some say break a leg to wish someone good luck. You are not actually supposed to injure them. Anyways, FYL OP. At least now you know for sure that there's something wrong. Your friend is an idiot.
RedPanda900 0
I like turtles.
jbtheone_fml 5
your ungrateful, sounds to me your friend helped diagnose you. You should buy him lunch and a beer.
mintcar 10
Its spelled you'... Ugh...never mind.
TardxxxCake 4
don't bother 38. he's just a dumb, fatass drunk country bumpkin that ***** his sister. he won't be around for long :) the alcohol poisoning will take care of him
Heliol 8
46 - first you disagree with 28 then you post like if you agree with 32? They pretty much said the same thing to OP.
DocBastard 40
Heliol - reread TardxxxCake's comment with a comma after "bother" and it will make a whole lot more sense to you.
jbtheone_fml 5
Oh grammar Nazi, the true losers of the world, who have nothing better to do. Oh, oh you should be ashamed of yourself and be banned from your Nazi camp for using such poor punctuation.
SpazzyPanda 0
^ word
SpazzyPanda 0
^ that was supposed to be for 46, my mistake.
bluejay22 4
wow you are a true jackass. how about this if you can't say something significant to this person who actually had a problem, then dont say shit at all.
evilcartman 0
**** him up months later
seximexi911 10
omg I'm so sorry!!! haha i wish someone would have punched him harder for you. but i hope everything goes well. :)
havoc1331 0
at least you know that you have them and saved money at the doctors office :)
nikki9tails 3
they still have to test, they need to know